I know I'm still an addict at 10 years clean. I have have that addictive thinking . Like if I want some material thing I have to have it . If I don't get it then I'm not happy. Or I get it then I want to return the item I bought. As long as I never use and don't let my desire for things I don't need , I'll be ok.
One time I filled a shopping cart with must have items. Got up to cash register, and realized my wallet was at home. So I left. Outside the shop it dawned on me that I didn't really have to have all those things. It was refreshing.
But the addict in me lives on. I can obsess that I need something, think about, and plan on getting it. It helps to remind myself that that's just my inner addict acting out!!
-- Edited by Davethewave on Wednesday 14th of January 2015 06:34:43 PM
Oh no Colin....I got that!!!!! I want it when I want it......You mean its really not all about me? After me,you come first..........Through daily work,guidance from the God of my understanding and application of our SOLUTION "the STEPS" in all areas of my Life....I am much better, a true "work in Progress... I always refer to myself as an addict first(I am an addict named Mike)because if I don't remember first what I am ,based on the evidence ,who I am will falter.. WE take this journey...Never Alone.(NA) Thanks CD.....
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
I was still an addict after 10 years Clean in Recovery
I was still an addict after 20 years Clean in Recovery
I was still an addict after 30 years Clean in Recovery
I am still an addict after 34 years Clean in Recovery
I think I sense a pattern!
Yup I am an Addict, my name's Mike. I have a disease called addiction from which there is no known cure. I will be an addict for the rest of my life. However a daily reprieve from active addiction and Recovery is possible the NA Way.
I have what I want and want what I have needing nothing. I really don't know when or how but somewhere along the Journey the endless dissatisfaction with where ever and whatever seems to have faded to mostly acceptance and patience.
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Work the Steps or Die MF. (My Friend :) Clean One Day At a Time by The Grace of God through The Power of NA
I LOVE to HATE this program its always reminding me how SICK I am :)
If its not all about me, i hate it.
If its not when I want it how i want it, i hate it.
And then a little voice says, SILENCE look what i have given you, you need for nothing and if you need something i will give it to you, stop complaining stop whining, be glad, grateful, here you big baby i have more so do not worry do not be intolerant or impatient, do not be greedy or gluttonous you are loved and taken care of like the birds and bees, you little baby hehehe.
And i usually say thank you God i am the least deserving and you make me humble, which is right where i should be....
