For us, to use is to die, often in more ways than one.
Basic Text, p. 82
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As newcomers, many of us came to our first meeting with only a small spark of life remaining. That spark, our spirit, wants to survive. Narcotics Anonymous nurtures that spirit. The love of the fellowship quickly fans that spark into a flame. With the Twelve Steps and the love of other recovering addicts, we begin to blossom into that whole, vital human being our Higher Power intended us to be. We begin to enjoy life, finding purpose in our existence. Each day we choose to stay clean, our spirit is revitalized and our relationship with our God grows. Our spirit becomes stronger each day we choose life by staying clean.
Despite the fact that our new life in recovery is rewarding, the urge to use can sometimes be overwhelming. When everything in our lives seems to go wrong, a return to using can seem like the only way out. But we know what the consequence will be if we usethe loss of our carefully nurtured spirituality. We have traveled too far along the spiritual path to dishonor our spirit by using. Snuffing the spiritual flame we have worked so hard to restore in our recovery is too dear a price to pay for getting high.
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Just for today: I am grateful that my spirit is strong and vital. Today, I will honor that spirit by staying clean.
When I found the rooms I had hardly any life left in me .At my first meeting I was scared , I got up and left , a man came outside and asked me to come in and listen to what was being said.He took me to meetings for 4 months . I asked him to be my sponsor when I had 6 months clean.Each day I was clean I saw new life coming out of me .I have had an urge to use a few tim es in the first 3 years , but I know now in my case it would be death. I am glad to have the willpower to stay clean through losing both of my parents and almost losing my own life this month,thank God and the Higher Power that I am still here.
