My sponsor always suggests that I look at myself to see what my part of the whole mess is. I have found that usually I am all wrapped up in me. When I am angry I have to look at what my payoff is for being angry, usually I get to feel sorry for myself, and wish to put the whole responsibility off on the other person. Many times the current situation reminds me of something that has happened in my past, and replays a situation where I felt helpless. When today's feelings and yesterday's feelings get mixed together I tend to lose my perspective. Have you heard the old saying that when you are pointing a finger at someone else, 3 fingers are pointing back at you? While there are times when it is appropriate to be angry, usually that isn't the case with me. Another thing that has been suggested to me is to separate whatever I am angry about into catagories according to their importance. Is it a big enough deal to make any difference tommorrow? How about next week? In a year? What about in ten years? I finally came to the conclusion that if whatever is making me angry will not result in the extinction of all humans, I need to put it into perspective. If it is not the end of the world, the situation will resolve itself, if I do my part.
Is being angry really worth the drain of emotional energy it requires? I call being angry a form of sick entertainment, it keeps my brain busy, instead of focusing on a solution.
Lon
-- Edited by Lon at 10:08, 2006-01-26
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Courage is not the towering oak that sees storms come and go; it is the fragile blossom that opens in the snow.----Alice Mackenzie Swaim
