I guess I should say that I've been using Tramadol for 1+ years now. I stopped cold turkey (yes, I know the dangers now). I've been doing as much online reading (when I'm physically able) and research as possible, something I highly suggest for those that don't have the option of rehab or a good support team. Let these forums be your life saver! They can! They've been mine in times where all I wanted to do was have a bomb hit my house or to slip into some coma to wake up when it's all over. I know that it wouldn't have done any good. I know I needed to go through all that I have and *am* to truly appreciate rehabilitation....I don't know how I feel about the words "recovery" yet. Anyway.....I've tried a few forums and they were all deserted or hadn't been in use in years it seems. Hopefully this isn't one of those places. I plan on posting my own little goings on here, now and then when I'm not achieving victories or focusing on myself improvement.
So I guess a BIG HELLO!! To all here! <3
Day 4 and about 75% better than day 1. I actually was able to feed my dogs and drive down to the corner gas station and go to the window. Small steps for most but they feel like HUGE victories for me! The yuck bucket is no longer a friend of mine and I don't regret our separation...I don't really care how it feels about our relationship. ;) I'm eating...crackers, Ensure, gatorade....I even indulged in an Easter cookie and strawberries! Slept almost all night ..only getting up at 4:45 a.m. with the slight "uncomfies" so I took my anti nausea pill and half a lortab and was good until a quarter to 10 in the morning! That was a victory in itself!
I don't know if I'm writing this for me or what...maybe there is someone else out there that's going through it and haven't quite reached this step. I know it feels good to shout my victories to the universe via this forum....but maybe they'll help someone else reading this....too sick to type or respond (I was *just* there mere days ago myself).....if so...that's awesome. :D If anyone is reading this "YAY ME!!" and I hope somehow this is a little inspiration for someone who's eyes might be caught by this forum/thread/post.
I can see day 7 in the future. Even though the big thing is to take it hour by hour and step by step. It's exciting to know that there's a light at the end of this hellish tunnel.
I'm also hoping that by next thursday I'll be able to make it to my first NA meeting. That's my biggest goal for the week. I'm so excited I could almost cry. I really hope this helps. I know going through what I have,that I will NEVER again take any pill prescribed or otherwise! I could never go through all this again and live. That's what is motivating me...and my family. My sister said to me, on day 2, that she missed her brother's light. Her brother that would light up a room and had so much laughter and positive energy abounding. I cried harder than I ever had.
You brought a tear to my eye. I still remember how all that feels, I just hope you never forget either. Remembering all that I have been through over the years is what helps me stay clean each and everyday. It's been just over 2and a half years now for me I pray that your one of the few that make it to .........
