went for work ended up at a bar that a friend goes that i knew 2 years agi when the doctor stuff was at it's worst so here i am again hung over what was i thinking??? i kknew i didn't need to be there but i wanted him to see i got my shit together god was i wrong hang over from hell still feeling the martinis so tomorrow is day one all over again why am i so damn stupid???????????????????
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Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough. Og Mandino
Recovery/Relapse" If we have relapsed,it is important to keep in mind that we must get back to meetings(support) as soon as possible.Otherwise,we may only have months ,days or hours,before we reach a threshold where we are "gone beyond recall'! Here take my hand, get back up and lets start again.In support and praying for ya!!!! :)
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
i just feel so stupid I have never blacked out from drinking guess there is a first time for everything I am in tears I was doin so well something I could be proud of then all in one drink insanity started again went thru 300 in a mtter of hours and don't know what happen good thing for triple a I guess i feel like shit "I have a dental appointment I need to get up and around for but still feeling the vodka my meds were missed so I have the shakes and don't know what to do??? :( will I evert get the time I had b4 the doctor?
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Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough. Og Mandino
Manon,It is hard to admit what you did but that is important .Lots of people do that and never come back.You did a great thing for your self you admitted you messed up.
If we have taken the First Step and admitted we are powerless over addiction (incl. alcohol) then we CANNOT be "stupid" when we use. That would imply that we had a choice and made a bad one. We do NOT have a choice if we are powerless.
That's why the next 11 steps are needed. So we don't have to be helpless, even though we are powerless.
And if in doubt about the powerlessness, we can get a clue from the second part of the 1st step. Unmanagability. Admitting unmanagability does not mean we are or were "stupid"...it is really being humble, and when we are honestly humble, we are spiritually receptive...even if we don't know it or appear to fight it all the way.
The value of sobriety does not reside in the fact of time accumulated...the value is in not using and being clean & sober TODAY. I can't "lose" what is already in the past. I can only strive to use what I did learn then and work the heck out of my program today.
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From dying and surviving to living and thriving. LeeU
:)
Manon,It is hard to admit what you did but that is important .Lots of people do that and never come back.You did a great thing for your self you admitted you messed up.
