"The steps lead to an awakening of a spiritual nature. This awakening is evidenced by changes in our lives."
Basic Text, p. 49
We know how to recognize the disease of addiction. Its symptoms are indisputable. Besides an uncontrollable appetite for drugs, those suffering exhibit self-centered, self-seeking behavior. When our addiction was at its peak of activity, we were obviously in a great deal of pain. We relentlessly judged ourselves and others, and spent most of our time worrying or trying to control outcomes.
Just as the disease of addiction is evidenced by definite symptoms, so is a spiritual awakening made manifest by certain obvious signs in a recovering addict. We may observe a tendency to think and act spontaneously, a loss of interest in judging or interpreting the actions of anyone else, an unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment, and frequent attacks of smiling.
If we see someone exhibiting symptoms of a spiritual awakening, we should be aware that such awakenings are contagious. Our best course of action is to get close to these people. As we begin having frequent, overwhelming episodes of gratitude, an increased receptiveness to the love extended by our fellow members, and an uncontrollable urge to return this love, we'll realize that we, too, have had a spiritual awakening.
Just for Today: My strongest desire is to have a spiritual awakening. I will watch for its symptoms and rejoice when I discover them.
I remember reading the story of Bill W. and how at the moment of his surrender the room filled with a blinding white light and he felt a bliss he had never known before. I would love to have a life changing moment like that. My sponsor assures me that it is rare to have a moment like that. That for the vast majority of us, the spiritual awakenings are a series of little moments. I'm fine with that. I have had several and if I continue to work and live the program they will keep coming.
I have to say that with out some sort of spiritual AWAKENINGS i might not have stayed clean/sober this long.
I have had moments of complete and total freedom from self I have had moments of a absolute feeling of a higher power in my heart and mind.
My awakenings, are many, not often but occasional maybe not the type that the room lights up in a flash but they are awakenings, epiphanys, AH HAH's LOL.
"...a loss of interest in judging or interpreting the actions of anyone else, an unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment, and frequent attacks of smiling..."
"an increased receptiveness to the love extended by our fellow members, and an uncontrollable urge to return this love..."
Verily the Steps do lead me to glimpses of what this could all mean and how it would be to live like that, as the Basic Text quote in the JFT states... from relentlessly judging myself and others due to my being in a great deal of pain, from worrying and controlling all outcomes, coming to NA and working the Steps continue to liberate me today... I've come to believe...
