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NA Message Board -> Narcotics Anonymous Message Board -> simply human
Post Info TOPIC: simply human
Manon


Guru

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Posts: 1080
Date:
simply human
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I have opened my eyes lately and not only realized how human I am looking around all kinds of ppl we are all human that might be silly to say but I guess certain ppl I put on pedestals and that is not right cause no matter what title that person might carry they are just as human as I am just would have never thought.
I am  glad I was given the oppertunity to see jst how all of us are nothing but human made to make mistakes.
Thru all the rought imes feom the ;last year I finally am findingf a  bit of peace seems to be going well already can't wait to skip town gotta get outta here damn gotta hate Oklahoma but I think I would be scared to move else where.

sometimes I like the way my mind works cause if Icatch in time I can make one post instead of several
well asI go thru my med changes trying to stabilize insurance wants to give me shit about too much anti depressents wtf is that?

Some times I suprise my self I figured I would be happy about the recent events in my life but its not as nice as Ithought but it isn't gonna heal the brusies.
all this time without a puter has almost drove me to the pysc ward in itself no contact with all my friends seeing as if they all seem to be here lol.

they are trying to pull me out of this depression it does not seem to be lifting they want me to go in at least my family does cause they can't handle my life either actually thought of moving outta state yet not too far just so my family would have some relief. I think if I were living further some things  might be easier and not being allowed to be without "escort" when I see my son although for a few hours I get him aone kinda in a public place like Iget to take my son shopping (gotta love credit cards) "eek"!
this might end up turining into a big old babble but it's been awhilesince I have posted...
Part of me has just shut down I feel numb almost all the time but when I don't Ifeel hard I hate that seems to be just another psrt of my life as it unfolds... I'll leave it there for now hope this finds you blessed

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 Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough.
Og Mandino

avid


Guru

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Posts: 2418
Date:
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Welcome back Manon you were dearly missed.
Hey where's the joke for today? LOL
Glad your back online.
I think it's sweet that you think about your family and how your condition affects them.
I can tell you that when I was in the depths of my depression and my addiction how my situation affected my family simply never crossed my mind.
How selfish is that?????
Your heart is loving and caring.
I pray that you find some peace and comfort.

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Keep it in the day.
MIKEF


Guru

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Posts: 2704
Date:
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Hey Manon !  GOOD TO SEE YOU..You know everytime I hear it said 'we didnt get here (become addicted) overnite so EASY DOES IT!" it reminds me to take a deep breathe and get closer to the day,so my "in the future mind" doesnt run away with me..Credit cards ,oh yeah,,we should be banned in my posse!Another 6th step 'WORK IN PROGRESS! :)  HHHHHMM now that I think of it ,many,many of them!!!!.Pray this year will be better for ya"one day at a time"..Talk to you on the rebound.peacesmileIm still chippin for blonde jokes........

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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery. 
cdbuckberry


Guru

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Posts: 1472
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smileManon,Glad to see your back.We miss you and your humor ,Take care of your self ,our emotions can take control of our willpower .But you can beat it.Having a computer and all of the people we can contact everywhere helps us all survive.yawn

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H.O.W.
LeeU


Guru

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Posts: 573
Date:
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You wrote " they want me to go in at least my family does cause they can't handle my life either". I agree with Avid that it's nice they even cross your mind...but on the other hand I wonder if you are also just considering it to give them some peace, so they can think they are helping, because otherwise they feel powerless and scared and you can't fix that.

I had no doubt whatsoever that when my daughter really needed to "go in", so she could stay alive, I had to do what I could to help her get there. But there were also times when she was able to say she thought there were other things she could do that might help her more. Not usually anything I agreed with!

So I had to come to terms with it being her life, however impaired. And she knew enough to readily manipulate the system to keep herself out anyway, even when she really was a danger to herself and others. So I had to get out of the control business. Ever read The Solist? Highly recommend it. (Not the film---just ain't the same.)

I had to learn to "Let go and let God" in a very deep, primal, life-changing way. Didn't stop the fear, the pain, the helplessness, the sorrow, the anger. But it did enable me not to circle the drain along with her. Even when I wanted to die from the pain myself. Maybe your family is in that place. If so, maybe you really need to just do what you believe is best for you .

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From dying and surviving to living and thriving. LeeU
Keli_A


Senior Member

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Posts: 135
Date:
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we are fragile bags of water and dust, floating down a river.  No one is better than anyone else.  We all want the same thing: A reason to live, Someone to love, and somone to love us back.  Google Lyrics Sting Fragile  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCUtBZatcZU

-- Edited by Keli_A on Wednesday 20th of January 2010 05:16:04 PM

-- Edited by Keli_A on Wednesday 27th of January 2010 06:43:05 PM

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You - God - Me
Manon


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1080
Date:
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couldn't get those links to work??

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 Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough.
Og Mandino

Keli_A


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 135
Date:
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try it now.
It may be a little al gore.

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