Well I honestly think the 12 steps and all that is a load of whatever for me personally. I think it works for many many people but i'm not gonna do all that. I used to be bad into drugs and then i had kids and quit everything except pot. Pot is the hardest one for me because it doesnt make me black out, it doesnt make me not eat or sleep for days like ice did. I am trying to quit for the fact that i am gaining weight from it. The anxiety part is what is keeping me from wanting to. i get frustrated and i just want to go smoke a fatty, and really what is wrong with it? I mean really, everyone does something to relax, and if it isnt effecting anyone around me except my weight what is the big deal. I went to rehab when i was 17 for crank and was there until about a week before 18, i dont see how they can say i was an addict or anything for the fact i was a kid. I was stupid and went crazy, if i were still tweaked out besides the 2 times (both runs were about 9 months long) i could see why you'd say i was addict but i stopped on MY OWN. no meetings no nothin.
Rachael, I used for39 years about anything or everything that would get you messed up.In the end the pot was the last one and the hardest to give up.I thought it really wasn't addictive,but it is physically addictive like nicotine.I treid to quit on my own four or five times it lasted a few weeks then I either forgot or just gave up and went looking again.Through all theses years of abuse I had five heart attacks quad-bypass surgery,stents in my arteries and am on my second pacemaker -defribilator , Until five years ago I smoked everyday even after all that surgery.Going to a meeting and learning to shut up and listen and try real hard to do what was being said and read the literature.It works I know ,but you got to be right on your toes addiction is a powerful disease and will walk right back in your life.
Hi Rachel! welcome.....For me there is no "little bit",I just cant use any mind altering substances because it takes me back to oblivion every time.Who's An Addict in our literature lets you examine yourself"honestly" and its up to you to go from there.I would think if you are here on this forum,something must be going on inside?.I have been clean now for over 25 years but didnt really begin recovery until I entered the rooms.,my story...Addiction is a physical,mental and spiritual disease, it manifests itslf in all areas of our lives,especiailly when we put the drugs down!!!!.Like it says, its not how much we use but how we react to the drug..I wish you well and hope you keep coming back!
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
oooookay. not sure what your question is, or if it was just a rant that the 12 steps aren't a path you want to take.
yet, you're here.
i heard you say that you've been in treatment a time or two, from a couple of impressive runs, but that you stopped on your own.
yet, you're here.
seems like anyone that could stop crank, should be able to manage their appetite.
yet, you're here.
i can relate to just wanting to be left alone to smoke my weed.
yet, i'm here.
i can relate to not being able to control my eating, and sickened with my physical state.
i'm glad i'm here.
finally, that maintenance plan of 'just weed' turned into something more.... much much more.. again, and again, and again, and again. life became desolate, empty and i really just wanted to die.
thank god i'm here! and i'm glad you're here. keep on talking - i hear me when you speak.
I think many of us in the fellowship felt something similar to what you are saying. Who knows, maybe you can do it. If you find out that you can't, well, you know where to find us. Good luck.
i just know i dont turn to the other drugs but yet i know i smoke a lot. i know it's a problem but how big of a problem when the only thing it effects is how fat i'm getting. i dont do meth anymore but yes i struggle with that a lot at least once a year i do it and realize what in the hell am i doing. but weed is so hard to quit because it doesnt make me go and sell everything i own or live on the streets. i want to quit but i guess i dont at the same time cuz i dont have health insurance to go out and get anxiety pills or anti depressants or whatever it would be. or even to see a counselor or whatever. i'm also an athiest that is why this wouldnt work for me cuz it's all about this higher power and i dont believe in a higher power unless science is a higher power. it's been 10 yrs since i was in rehab
Rachael, I used for39 years about anything or everything that would get you messed up.In the end the pot was the last one and the hardest to give up.I thought it really wasn't addictive,but it is physically addictive like nicotine.I treid to quit on my own four or five times it lasted a few weeks then I either forgot or just gave up and went looking again.Through all theses years of abuse I had five heart attacks quad-bypass surgery,stents in my arteries and am on my second pacemaker -defribilator , Until five years ago I smoked everyday even after all that surgery.Going to a meeting and learning to shut up and listen and try real hard to do what was being said and read the literature.It works I know ,but you got to be right on your toes addiction is a powerful disease and will walk right back in your life.
