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Post Info TOPIC: My favorite character defect"BEAT MYSELF SENSELESS!!!


Guru

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Posts: 2704
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My favorite character defect"BEAT MYSELF SENSELESS!!!


Hello family,Just wanted to share where im at today
First thing Eric is in locked psych center,detox and out of contact for now.I think of the children in our lives,anthony,lee,dean,tisa, all others that "share from their hearts here"i think of how vinnies mom took him to the next town ,dropped him off to try and save his life,how raman is feeling need to be in his daughters life and more active,the choices we make and the things we do.I spent a few days doing what I do best"beating my self sensless over bad decisions made.As I step back ,look at the 'big  picture" I am confident God will work this all out.I cant get yesterday back,My whole process is "living in this day:" and when I lose site of that I do "addict things"!!I isolated for couple days,didnt touch base with my sponsor in either fellowship I am "working"I was feeling like"whats it worth .all this "work' and I still make crap decisions.You knw what,when i was active almost 25 years ago,I made really crap decisions for almost 25 years!!!Our literature tells us"in our 7th step,the main objective of step 7 is to get out of ourselves and strive to achieve the will of our higher power.If we are careless and fail to grasp the spiritual meaning of this step,we have difficulties and stir up old troubles.One danger is being too hard on ourselves !!! Bingo.beat myself senseless..Anyway,just for today,i am back working even more diligently and know ing that its progess not perfection moving forward in this addicts life.I am so blessed to have you all in my life so I no longer have to 'DEAL WITH THINGS ON MY OWN" llike I did for so long.I wish all peace and a productive daysmile


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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery. 



Senior Member

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Posts: 3718
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Good deal Mike you share it from the heart and i feel yuh 4 sure


Getting into the readings and literture helps us get grounded again getting back to the meetings let's our higher power speak to us through others, getting into service helps get out of self last night meeting I cleaned up the coffee area just wanted to get the hell out of my head for all of 2 minutes LOL and be a part of the group.

They say we're where we need to be and your boy is where he needs to be, shut him down and off the streets for awhile and maybe he can get the help and clarity he needs and make a fresh start.

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It's all about spirituality...


Guru

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Posts: 3987
Date:

Thanks for sharing that Mike. 

Just for today,I will remember the code you shared
 
"One danger is in being too hard on ourselves !" 

Just for today, I will stay away from that whenever it comes up !

-- Edited by Raman on Thursday 22nd of October 2009 02:15:44 AM

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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!


Guru

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Posts: 2704
Date:

Hey Raman,how are you my friend!
I will contact you tonight  after my meeting.talk to you later my friend!!



__________________

Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery. 



Senior Member

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Posts: 436
Date:

(((((MikeF)))))

My arms are tired from beating myself up. Are your arms tired, too? Tell ya what, I'll beat on you for a while, you can beat on me for a while.

~shrug~

Well, it makes as much sense as beating ourselves up does!!! LOL!

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I may not be 'All That', but I'm always on my mind!
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