today is/would be 4 months clean for me. i dont count smoking pot one day as a relapse. yeah yeah someone is going to argue with me about this but whatever i believe what i want to. so today i am 4 months clean. thats the longest ive ever gone. its been a tough 4 months but god damn i made it. just thought i would let everyone know. ps if your going to argue about me using one day then dont bother posting because ill just get pissed off and do something that would not be good. k thanks
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"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
NA is a nonprofit Fellowship or society of men and women for whom drugs had become a major problem. We are recovering addicts who meet regularly to help each other stay clean. This is a program of complete abstinence from all drugs. There is only one requirement for membership, the desire to stop using. We suggest that you keep an open mind and give yourself a break. Our program is a set of principles written so simply that we can follow them in our daily lives. The most important thing about them is that they work. There are no strings attached to NA. We are not affiliated with any other organizations, we have no initiation fees or dues, no pledges to sign, no promises to make to anyone. We are not connected with any political, religious or law enforcement groups, and are under no surveillance at any time. Anyone may join us, regardless of age, race, sexual identity, creed, religion or lack of religion. We are not interested in what or how much you used or who your connections were, what you have done in the past, how much or how little you have, but only in what you want to do about your problem and how we can help. The newcomer is the most important person at any meeting, because we can only keep what we have by giving it away. We have learned from our group experience that those who keep coming to our meetings regularly stay clean.
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The fundamental delusion of humanity , is to suppose that I am here and you are out there .
Any clean addict is a miracle, and you have a right to be proud. Ya, I disagree with youy, but why would I argue the point??? I'm glad that you're here and clean, just for today!
You ROCK that clean-time Sister-Girl!
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I may not be 'All That', but I'm always on my mind!
Hey Liz! thanks for letting us know where your at.Any day clean for an addict is a miracle.This is about "your recovery" no one elses!Be proud of the steps forward you make.We all are making this journey and travelling many different roads.Days will turn into weeks into months into years ,one day at a time..You are reaching areas where you havent been before as you say .I would stay focused on that. As Tisa said we may not agree on all things but "being clean and not using"is where we want to be.
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
LizC I am glad for you 4 months clean.Thats great keep up the good work.Keep Coming Back It Work If You Want It.Try not to slip up next time ,honesty is very important part of recovery.We as addicts were good at lieung and convincing ourselves to do thinks.I will have five years clean in January on the 10th.I never thought inthis lifetime I could say that.38 years of using wears you out physically and mentally.
Liz you crack me up your so damned STUBBORN just like me .
I congratulate you on 4 months clean from your drug of choice I ASSume thats what you mean ? HEY i had an O'douls non alcoholic beer yesterday some people say thats a relapse because there is a slight amount of alcohol in that beer, 0.5 percent or less in each beer I didn't feel a damn thing off it and after 4 hours of cleaning my garage it was damn nice to sit and have a brewski it tasted wonderful.
I have learned for myself what works and what works is complete abstinence got messed up bad on pain pills because of back pain cant take those and even if I did pot i'd be right back to crack and booe in no time so that just wont work for me you'll have to see how it goes for yourself, just be totally honest with yourself I know your honest with us but the one things that is most important is yourself and this disease is cunnnnning, i even had to put myself in check over that O'douls but damnit I didnt miss getting drunk just a nice cold beer now and then and i only have one at a time and if it causes me to want more then just that I know I have some inventory taking to do real quick.
Anyhow blah blah blah your going to do what you want no matter what anyone says that last part ill just get pissed off and do something that would not be good. I think you need to take a look at that comment sounds like all you need is someone to blame to go off ? I personally Won't let anyone or anything get me so crazy I end up using and stop taking responsibility for my addiction over, it's a cop out if you do.
I have to agree with Vini but ya know the thing that i thought was funny? One: ther is an equal and oppisite reaction to every action Two: I am not responsible for your bad beahvior (yoou do something bad that's all you girl) I don't have that power nor do I want it! anyway ther is my 2 cents
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Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough. Og Mandino
An incident or event by itself has no theory to it till we construct meaning according to individual or collective ideology !
I know from my experience that staying clean comes first and that no matter what, just for today, an addict like me never has to use again !
Now Im going through very painful moments in my life.
The first thing is the realization that Im not youth anymore, nearly 50 now. I need to make the best of what Ive already been given in life; a good recovery, good education, some talent in music and a good family abnd friend support network. But Im realizing that the same stresses and tensions I brushed off as part of everyday living are causing havoc in my life. The medications, though not mood changing or mind altering in any way, is leaving me with wracking pains and total discomfort. Bad dreams and nightmares, unsound sleep, loss of control over negative emotions like rage and fear are all a reality I need to face, as have been for the past three months and for another three months at least. I have been offered pain killers, sleeping meds etc. by qualified medical professionals but have stoutly refused all of it. Im refusing because I know that my body, in the ong r8n, will not know the difference between drugs [prescribed my medics and those that I prescribe for myself. I klnow that when I use drugs in one form or another, I release my addiction all over again.
I know that I will not be awarded a military medal or some other civilian honour for staying clean. What I know also is that by staing clean of all drugs, Ive been given even greater gifts, though I expected nothing of the sort at that time nad stayed clean for the sake of staying clean ! Most importantly for me, I dont want to change any of the ideology that NA has given me, my life and love for the ones I care about is at stake in the event of using drugs, in any form whatsoever !
Now that said, I have nothing more to say, except that each of us has to decide for his or her own self, so let it be !
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Good job on the 4 months- I am sure don't need to judge anyone on what they think, 'cuz I know there's one who will judge me in the end. One day at a time, that's all we can do- Although for me, I can't put any "mind- altering" substances in my body at all or else I will be worse off than when I admitted complete defeat to this thing.
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"...To weather the storms of tomorrow, you've got to have strength today."
Here's what happened to me. I had one week less than 3 months clean and I went to a concert, on my birthday, for which my buddy had back stage passes (Johnny Winter for you music fans). After the show was over we were standing back stage about 6 of us in a circle talking when someone lit a joint and started passing it around. I didn't know how to say no without feeling like a dweeb so I took one hit and passed it. I don't even know if I got high. It took me about a week to tell my sponsor. He got real upset at me and fired me, which didn't feel too good. Needless to say I went to a meeting and got a white chip and started over, again for about the 10th time. It took me over 2 years and 3 months of steadily going to meetings to finally get 90 days. But I can tell you this, there are no astericks next to my clean and sober date. There are days (and nights) when I questioned my clean time over the years. I've been plagued with drunk and using dreams where the dream tried to convience me, that somewhere in my clean time, I had cheated by using. If I hadn't started over, after that night of my birthday, I may not have been able to place the 100% faith in my recovery that was needed time and time again when it was tested. They say that all any of us has is one day at a time, but I'll tell you that my clean and sober time is battle tested and has been able to withstand 20 years of all the bullshit that life has to throw at you and it has held up and saved my life.
