sorry if I am hogging the board lately but you are my only support so far with the MA chat room I joined but that can get a little crazy.
i tried to find live meetings but they are either right at my son's bedtime or one was at 10 a.m. and I coudn't get a sitter but I'll keep trying.
I had another night of nightmares and no sleep. Also I'm a single mom, my son is dealing with obstructed bowels and I have two jobs. It all seems too much right now, plus the snow. It feels like I'm going nuts but I know it will all even out once I get to know myself again and find peace somehow. I can't wait till this detox is over and this whole addiction nightmare is behind me.
Detox is on it's way out but addiction in incurable... It manifests in every area of our lives. That's why I've been so ardent in suggesting you find meetings and a sponsor and get involved in RECOVERY once you're through the detox. It's important Emily. I'm so grateful to be an addict IN RECOVERY. I've learned so much about myself and how to be happy and productive and responsible but I learned that through the steps. This is a twelve step program, not an abstinence only program. You can take your son to a meeting, many of us have struggled with kids and work and meetings... YOU CAN DO THIS! I believe in you.
Emily, an addict without drugs or recovery is a pretty miserable person. We need the tools of recovery just like we had tools for getting high, our literature, our steps, sponsorship, meetings, support group, phone numbers, etc.
All that said, I'm really happy for you! Seven days is a freaking lifetime!
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The truth does not change based on my inability to stomach it - Flannery O'Connor
My happiness grows in direct proportion to my acceptance and in inverse proportion to my expectations - Michael J. Fox
Hang in there Emily just hold on things will get better i hope your son gets better also soon i hate that obstructed bowel thing I got it myself a few months ago man was that a terrible thing darn near had to go to the hospital pain was so bad .
The nightmares pass though at times i still have them but seldom these days i remember my first few days of detox it was horrible heck i was dreaming awake i was kicking alcohol and cocaine the alcohol was the worse part with seizures sweats and horrible thoughts and visions vomitting for 3 days solid at home alone.
Things will work out maybe you need to cut back a little on work for just awhile ? so you can get to a few meetings I knwo we all have to try and make a living but you need some extra support right now and everything depends on these next few months for you to focus on recovery so maybe somehow you can work out something and get to those meetings.
Nothings gonna be easy , this is recovery your going to be up against all sorts of walls to hurdle, just have to find a way over them and stay clean
Big V - I think what you have done is awesome. I think MJ is relatively 'mild' compared to what you have been through. You are such a GREAT inspiration and I love your sense of humor. Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you.........! lol
Jana, Thank you too (all of those I just gave to V) - you are so smart and put things very well so that I totally understand what you mean.
You guys are angels, truly, I have a great deal of respect for you!!
