Hello - Today is my first day without vicodin and I'm miserable. I know I have a problem, I readily admit that, but my not having vicodin is not really by choice. I don't have any more and I'm miserable. I'm far from hitting rock bottom, but I'm here because that's just it - I don't want to. I don't go through any withdrawals (besides depression) and my use is very minimal, but I want to quit so bad - NOW. I just need to know where to start. I see a counselor, but she doesn't specialize in addiction. I have friends and family, but no one knows about my addiction. I would never go to meetings, it takes every ounce of strength I have just to go to work full-time 5 days a week, I just feel like I can't do anything without vicodin. If I'm posting in the wrong place I apologize, again I'm new to this. I just wanted to know if anyone could tell me where to start? How do you not take pain pills when they're readily available to you and you know that they're the only things in this world that make you truly happy?? How do you begin? Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks.
My very first thing to say is Congratulations on getting started and your life can change now.
It's going to be different so get used to that idea, when things get tough just consider saying " This is different and I need to get used to it and NOT USE".
Get the NA book and start reading from the begining.
You have come here for a reason if your sick and tired of having to use pills to make you feel good then this program can work for you, I never say a person can't stay clean without hitting a real hard bottom because there are always exceptions, the thing is you just have to have a DESIRE to stop and do other things other then use.
I could say the same thing myself Crack is every where, alcohol is in just about every store I walk into, the idea is I don't want to depend nor be a prisoner to those things any more and yes I get miserable too and I have just gone through several weeks of depression but the alternative to use, the desire to use or the need to use is not there. This too shall pass, every feeling pass's in time , I don't turn my life over to drugs or alcohol anymore I turn it over to a power greater then that stuff.
I am glad you came asking for help, ready or not your here for a reason and a purpose and you can stay clean as long as you have that desire, we Welcome you.
Well let me see what helped me when I got to where you are is this Bella,
I went and got real honest with my pastor that yes I am an addicted to drugs. He actually made the phone call to the na hotline in his office, found a meeting that evening, printed a map to one not that far from my church that Wednesday night. I went and said that I was new and didn't want to stay addicted to it anymore. I got phone numbers, I used those phone numbers, I went to meetings, I got a homegroup and I got a sponsor and I tried to pimp my sponsor at first, but then I started to using her to help me to stay clean and it has worked for coming up on 8 months on January 12th 2009. I call other addicts, I make meetings, I do what is asked of me even when I don't feel like doing it right now. I share my feelings with my network. I am in the midst of having to find a new sponsor possibly here soon. I am not sure what I am doing. I got those numbers and used them. I read Who is an addict for 30 days and I worked my first step with my sponsor and I am still on my first step with her right now. She is making me practice those steps right now on a daily basis. I follow the suggestions that are suggested to me right now. I try them once and if they don't work I don't keep them around I only use the suggestions once and keep what I need. Throw some of the crazier suggestions out the windows at times.
