I have recently found this forum as i know i have to change the pattern in my life. I am 30 years old and currently living in Wiltshire. I am originally from London and after several years of drug misuse ( weed, coke, E , MDMA) i feel i have to change and having read some of the posts on here, i felt this was a good place to start.
When i came to live in Wiltshire about 1 year ago, i was a broken man. I was mentally fragile, malnourished and pretty much falling apart. Now over a year down the line, things were going ok. I had put on weight, was'nt smoking weed and was starting to save money. But in the past 4 months i have taken to going back up to London and blowing large amounts of money on weed, hotels and coke. Spending the weekend doing coke and weed on my own is not right as i well know. Also this sets me back financially although that can be rectified and is the least of my worries.
Im sure some of you may recognise it, but i seem to push this self distruct button whenever i seem to be getting somewhere.
I am now bracing myself for work tomorrow and i have yet again taken over a week off (lying that i was ill) and have spent the week smoking weed and sitting in my little cottage worrying about having to go in again.
I was wondering if anyone had any words of wisdom or could point me in the right direction to start.
don't use one minute one day one second whatever it takes find someone to be your sponsor or safty net if you will and call them before you use but on top of all DON'T USE
ROCKY
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some of us win some of us lose with god and this program i will be a winner
Welcome home BillyB, glad you found us, stay with us, together we can accomplish what we each cannot accomplish alone IT WORKS! NA hugs, I'm Tahir, an addict from India.
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
The million dollar question is "what makes Billy B so uncomfortable in his own skin, that he has to self medicate most of the time, just to feel normal"? The paradox is that you have to be clean and sober for awhile to figure it out. You need to buy time, just like the rest of us do "one day at a time" going to meetings, working the 12 steps, changing our friends to those who are recovering successfully, so that we can learn from them how to have a good life free from the substances that will kill us. Get to a lot of meetings and give yourself to this simple program.
Hello Newboy BillyB, how have you been? Did ya get to local meetings at your town, hope all is well with you, NA Hugs.
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
IT WORKS! NA hugs, I'm Tahir, an addict from India.
