I haven't heard from a friend in montana in about a month (she and i did time together in the 90's) and it feels like a loss....everything i let go of has claw marks on it, ha. you'd think that after 16 years in an 8 by 10 foot cell i'd be accustomed to living with next to nothing in my world, but i crave contact. anyone awake out there?
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I think people are full of guile.....I enjoy that.
im confused by your apparent total isolation annie . is there absolutely nobody out where you are ? these rooms and the many more like it can help for sure. but one of the basest human needs is contact with other humans. that's real contact not cyber contact. I'm just wondering about your situation. for me it would be dangerous.
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" If you have built castles in the air , your work need not be lost ; that is where they should be . Now put the foundations under them . "
Well, I have contact....my husband, my cats, my spiritual/therapeutic material, this board.....meetings are 60 miles away, and I can't afford a breathalyzer for my car to get to them. guess I crave lots of contact. I get here several times a day. lots of addicts say the craving for a high does go away, but sometimes i long for a fix. my friend in montana and i were calling or emailing many times a week, but im just about counting it a loss.....i just wish she'd tell me if she was in the hospital or something worse. my sponsor emails or calls a few times a week, and i email my parents every day. but my husband, parents, friend are not in recovery. many times i've told my husband i would like the breathalyzer (I do electrical work for him several times a week, but some days there's no work for me so I stay home). i'd say i'm surrounded by things to occupy me, but it's program people i crave. my sponsor isn't enough, so i joined here. so far, so good. when i went to meetings before i moved up here after marrying, i fell in love with all the guys, ha, and some of them fell in love with me....another reason i hesitate to go to a f2f (without my husband with me, and he's really not supposed to go in with me as he's an Earth person). as i reached the one month mark of not hearing from my friend in montana, it feels like she's gone forever, a less-than-mature reflex i have. only program people can usually relate. checking in several times a day has helped more than i can say. just your response, mrwinky, got me out of the funk.
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I think people are full of guile.....I enjoy that.
excuse me , but I'm just a dumb ole redneck,,what do you mean by " hes not supposed to go in with me as hes an earth person " and what is an earth person ? when people ask me where I'm from i always say earth. just because my dad was military and we moved alot. if i cant go to meetings because I'm an earth person ........................I'm screwed. hahha...oh and does that mean the rest of us are aliens ? no wonder I'm so insane. this aint my planet.
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" If you have built castles in the air , your work need not be lost ; that is where they should be . Now put the foundations under them . "
Yeah, some old timer called non-addicts "Earth people" and that stuck with me. One said she was a zebra amongst horses, which I can relate to as well. hey, what are the online meetings like? I'm usually in bed by 9pm cuz we get up at dark-thirty for work....or should i break down and get the breathalyzer? I hear gas prices are going down, ha.
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I think people are full of guile.....I enjoy that.
Gas prices aren't going down...least not around here...I just spent an hour texting and calling a dozen people trying to get ride to a meeting tonight since my gas gauge is getting low and my funds are even lower - to no avail.
Most meetings are "open" which means anyone may attend. Our area actually only has one meeting that is a "closed" meeting, for addicts only. My mom used to attend meetings with me years ago when I was court ordered when I went to a different fellowship, and she just laughed about how she was the only non----aholic that attended 4-6 meetings a week.
I've had to drag my daughter to many a meetings too. The way I see it, we are a "family" and what family doesn't have kids in it? LOL. Have you talked about him driving you so you don't need to spend the extra on the breathalizer? Plus he could be there to help support you.
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"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." ~Oscar Wilde~
earth people huh ...we used call em squares. lol, i wont digress, I'm in north carolina and gas here is down as much as 50 cent or fiddy as the kids say,, if you have the cash pop for the blow -n -go . considering the option, ( talking to morons like me ) it seems like getting out could do you a world of good. good luck anthonyg
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" If you have built castles in the air , your work need not be lost ; that is where they should be . Now put the foundations under them . "
okay, no contempt prior to investigation for me.....i'll try the drive, with or without my hubby. "behold, I do a new thing" is a meditation for me that meshes with my definition of na, "new attitude". ha ha, even with the blow and go (I'm still laughing my ass off over the Tree Police) I'm such a shitty driver that maybe I should let him do the driving.
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I think people are full of guile.....I enjoy that.