LAst evening I had a very pleasant conversation with my 22 year old Son. We laughed and had such a wonderful time. He shared about his job and how he was doing, how some of the clients he services are. The restaurants are dirtier in some nationalities more so than others. Since he orders, delivers, and picks up the money for the chemicals to clean all the machines in these restaurants.
He went out years back and did this enormous tatoo years ago across his back. I was so hurt and upset I could have klilled he and his father, but that was then, this is now.
Then my father the wonderful influence that he can be sometimes Ha ha, suggested that he, my Son should get a Bug across his left pectoral. I am calling it a bug because I don't beleive in the Horoscopes. So to tick me off I really think he went and did it just to make me mad.
Anyway, last evennig he tells me since it was never finished he is going to have a Black Panther cover it. When I gave him my opinion about it again and God's view on the subject he comes back with. Gee, Mom what you say would hold allot more weight if you didn't have tatoos. O.K. that is true! But I did mine 39 years ago. The first one and the second one was 37 years ago, and then I covered it 34 years ago.
Does it matter that I had explained my life was different back then I was a rebellious kid. Only 13 years old and I was drinking and taking all kinds of drugs. I was riding on the back of my boyfriends motorcycle. He happened to be a H.A. and I was told to get one of the Tatoos. Flattered at that age and that time like a ninny I did it. When I woke up and figured out that I made a mistake I was 18 years old and I covered it. I never lied to him. He knows our Faith teaches us that it's an abomination to God and it is connected to the occult. I will continue to pray and ask for God's Will for his life on this situation. He shared that he is drug tested randomly at his work. So why in the world would anyone go get a tatoo Sober? Thats the other issue he will drink to get it. I certainly hope that my actions have spoken to him more than my words. But he is my only Son and putting tatoos all over his body is like taking a bucket of paint and throwing it on the Mona Lisa. Of which I have been blessed enough to have been able to view at the "Lueve" in Paris. Thanks, Blessed
You have to let go Mom and let the boy be his own man
My mom was VERY upset when she saw my tattoo I hid it for as long as I could since it goes all the way across my stomach and is huge lettering, I felt bad when she saw it and am still some what ashamed but at that time in my life I figured I was done for and my life would be spent behind bars and I really didn't care much about anything.
I have other tattoos I've wanted and there all bad things, I just keep putting it off and will probably never get them done, I don't need to get back into that head space I was in then dont need to defile my body any longer.
We have no control over people Blessed, if its bothering you your probably wanting that control over him? can't really blame you though maybe just explain the regret he might have one day over them
Thanks for that! YEAh I liked to control my Son, Husband, life in general because I can't. But GOD can! He walked out of here along time ago and did some hanous stuff that I prayed, pleaded, screamed, tried to stop, controlled, called the police, payed tons and tons of money to have him stop. None by the way worked so I blamed myself.
SO he calls knowing that I hate what he did to his back with the Italian thing he has. Knowing that he still has a pending court case for punching a girl in the nose. And to beat that he moves every 2 months makes 52 to 60 thousand a year and ries to me for money. While his father that is partial owner of 7 Restaurants in S.F. Bayarea does nothing to be with or help his Son all these years. Just pay off the attorney bill of 20,000.00 this time becasue he almost took our home.
So control! Heck, I lost control of Vito 6 years ago. Just like my parents lost control over me at 13 years old. But I thought it was going to be different. And it can still be different. He said it was because I have tatoos, thats why he did his.
thanks for sharing your heart out Blessed. Glad you're here with us. We need your calm, reassuring presence NA Hugs & Fellowship Love.
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
What a brat I have for a Son. But I LOVE him never the less. I invited him to dinner on Sunday Night with a confirmed date at 4:30 to 5:00 p.m. arrival and then we would eat. I bought and preparred Baby Back ribs, Tri-Tip and Salmon, not to mention the other food with it. Potatoes, baby Roma's in Balsamic, Asparagus, chocolate cake I was so excited that he was coming over to see us that I made a dinner for him and invited his Grandparent's also.
My folks arrived on time and my Son was a no show. We got a hold of him and he was still in San Francisco and hadn't left yet. That was an hour drive or better so I was thouroughly disappointed now. We all ate and went about our visit which was pleasant. Then it got to be too late for my parent's to stay so they went home.
My husband had to go into the office to close down the week end. So I was still waiting for my Son. He came 3 1/2 hours late showing up with an Apology but the reason he was late. I could have died and gone to heaven. He got a "TATOO." After all our conversation the other day about him putting more tatoos on his body. He didn't cover the one he talked about or even work on it at all. He put a NEW ONE on. One that isn't even in English.
REBELLION costs us so much in our lives. I can't do anything to change what he does or chooses to do. I am just not going to bail him out anymore. He is on his own and will have to live with whatever decision he makes. Just like the rest of us. Thanks for letting me write my heart pain.
NA Hugs & Fellowship Love.
