Even after knowing all the horror in our World today or even on here at times with the continual relapses and so on. All I can say today is that I have Hope because I have a "GIFT." That gift lives in me each day that I am Clean and Sober living with a Recovery program. I still do things that go against my normal behavior.
I still need work on my behaviors. I don't like to give advice because I don't think that I am qualified to give it, nor do I like people giving me advice on matters that are none of there business. Unless it is on matters that are in Recovery from the books or from what has been written that is "TRUTH". I went to a meeting tonight that was on just that subject, then right after the meeting I was given all kinds of advice I didn't want. SO with a smile and a nod I didn't lash out or speak unkind at the people that were over talking to me. I cordially removed myself from there presence after they finished and left the meeting.
Unless it is Sponsorship, Licensed Couselor's Doctor's, Dentists, Attorneys, or those that are in a particular field. I have learned to speak less, and listen more as I have aged in Recovery. Listening more and speaking less you learn more too!
Today I am full of HOPE so that I can listen and LEARN more because I am no longer using or drinking. Many times with good intentions I have treaded on ground giving to much advice that I shouldn't have. On page 49 of the N.A. book it speaks about to much advice to the New comer that we will loose respect from them. That we are to carry the message after Step 12 and only carry the message to the suffering addict. Not my mouth!
Thanks for the share! This note is not advice, but I do like to hear people share what they have learned and their view point of how the steps work for them. I think we all end up with a slightly different veiw point.
kenh.
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God is the only one you can depend on in recovery.
fOR gODS SAKE,,, IM ALSO REMINDED OF A SLOGAN i READ MANY YEARS AGO THAT WAS VERY USEFUL AND EVEN NOW IS WHEN i REMEMBER IT=== LISTEN TO LEARN AND LEARN TO LISTEN ! MY LIFE BECOMES MORE UNMANAGEABLE WHEN I DONT ADMIT UNMANAGEABILITY !!! and this for me nowadays means that emotions can run high and run wild !! so im also reminded that what gets me off my feet,, other than a crane ,lift or airplane is bound to land me in trouble !!In doing the 12 Steps one thing i learnt about myself is i am basically a selfish,selfmotivated individual !! that Truth didnt feel good till my sponsor said to me that it may be an unchangeable part of me,,, however I can always point that in another direction,,, towards others and look for oppurtunities to help !! thats 2 and 3 in my life,,, in 2 i let stop the insanity of trying to change myself so as to be acceptable,,, instaed I accept people for who they are without having to pass judgement on em !! In 3 i ask God how inspite of being selfish i can turn that towards society,Fellowship and family and friiends !!And add profession where I entertain and have to conciously turn over selfishness towards social goals,, its been working many years now for this addict !!
-- Edited by Raman at 14:39, 2007-11-27
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Blessed, Wow, I ALMOST don't know what to say. Has no one ever told you that YOU are an AMAZING PERSON, A CREATION OF GOD OR WHATEVER HIGHER POWER YOU CHOOSE to BELIEVE in and you have a great deal to give not only to recieve. so your viewpoint carries weight. what makes you thnk a trained lawyer, counsellor, dentist etc is always right. Maybe only in their choosen field, but I don't necessarily want to go out to dinner with my dentist? And in recovery, there is no one more qualified to give me advice than another recovering addict whose travelled or travelling the same path, remember it's a journey, not a destinantion. So the shrink who isn't an addict but has a degree is more qualified than an addict with 12 years clean time? I don't think so. I'd rather listen to you.
Blessed I wonder how much you value yourself? I do get your point about boundaries though. There is a time and a place for everything. And we as individuals do have respect one anothers boundaries.
The preambles clearly state that we take nothing away that cannot be reconciled with what is not said in the big book. I don't remember the word advice being used specifically. We say keep coming back. We say it is our duty to help those still suffering.
I'm having a hard time connecting hope to what you've said because you seem to be really hard on yourself. My hope in putting down the bottle and the pills is that is that it's the start, only the start of a better me. With that follows the end of the lying and the cheating and the stealing all the other crap I was doing. I have to believe that tomorrow is going to be a brighter day, otherwise all this work I'm doing on myself for myself and those arond me and for God would mean nothing. It would all be for nothing. And the only people who understand my journey and how hard it is, why and how I picked up in the first place, and why I continued, are fellow addicts like you. So why would I listen to and take advice from anyone else?
And Hope is what we share by giving it away we keep what we have which is always a valuable commodity in the rooms, other suffering addicts can learn much from each of us who one day at a time remain clean.
If it wasn't for someone once sharing to me that when they had lost hope and were at there bottom something happened inside of them , the compulsion to use was lifted once at that surrendering point. I asked him to explain that point and he said you'll know when you get there :) and i didn't stop looking and one day it hit me sorta like a pipe wrench against my head :)P then I knew what he was talking about.
Speak up Blessed but listen too, listen to the new comer who's still suffering listen to the old timer who has much wisdom to share as you do also.....
Much love Blessed don't ever discount your value here and out there.
