ok im going to tell you guys my secret. i quite using opiod pain pills about six weeks ago. but i didnt quite drugs. when i was a teenager i used pot all the time. when i met my husband he did too, but when we decided to get married and have a family we put the stuff up and we didnt have any problems. no withdrawls, no cravings, no evedince that we were addicted to the substance at all. so when i became addicted to pot and knew i had to quite, i took pot back up in order to help with the transition. it got my mind off of my addiction and i was able to enjoy my evenings after the kids went to bed. well its been six weeks now and i think my body is ready to go completly clean. but im not sure my mind is ready. has anyone tried the same thing i am doing? my body doesnt build up a tolerance to this particular substance, so it has acted as a crutch while a got off of the pills. i know that my body is willing to give up the crutch, but inside i feel an overwhelming desire to hold on to it. im scared that if i get off, i will go back to pills faster that i can count to ten. but after six weeks of smoking every night, i feel that i have no concentration, a short attention span, and that its just messing with my brain, i feel actually stupid all the time. even when im not on it. i dont remember pot having this affect on me when i was younger, but im sure im not naturally this stupid. could someone give me some advice.
the only one that can say when you are ready is you. NA offers a new way to live I suggest you find a meeting inn you area you can by going to na.org and to help with the process we have on line meeting everynight at 10 hope to see you there
I just wanted to add my view on pot, I came into NA almost 2 years ago from a homeless shelter completely broken mentally, physically and spiritually. I was at the end of my rope, I felt unloved and unable to love like a discarded piece of garbage...hopeless. All of that mess I was in was because of pot. It was the only drug I did and it brought me to my knees just like any other drug could. Please dont fool your self into thinking of it as a soft drug. There are no soft drugs. I truly hope you find your way, grab hold of this recovery program it will change your life.
ok, im ready. you guys are great. i thought that pot was a step down from my real addiction, but maybe i was just trading one for the other. the problem is, i know where the na meetings are in my area. but i cant get there. i have no car and even though its within walking distance, i work days and my husband works afternoons and we have three kids under the age of 5 so someone has to be home at all times. iv tried to log on to your online meetings but for some reason my computer wont let me. i really need you guys help. i want to be sober and a good mother and a respected person but its so hard. i feel like my life has been taken over by my children and the drugs were the only thing that was for me. at least it was a fake happy for a little while. my husband and i live an low income appt. we both work in the fast food bussiness. making barley over minn wage. how are people suppose to find true happieness while living paycheck to paycheck and careing for children with developmental dissabilties. i really need some encouragment, because right now, the temptation to go out and look for drugs is unbarrible.
Greetings Stiffy, welcome to Miracles In Progress Family. Glad you reached out and shared with us. Keep sharing with us here at the forum, and as far the use of chatroom, do you have java applet on your comp as this chatroom runs on it... maybe you need to download java if you don't as yet have it installed...
Stiffy, all we need is a desire to stop using drugs as a solution to our feelings, limitations and living problems, and I can see you have plenty of it, and as long as it is so, I'm sure you will find ways to be part of NA for your daily recovery.
And yes, just like Sandra said, it's not pills, pot, sugar, alcohol or any other drug that is my problem. It's my addiction to things be it drugs or alcohol or food or sex or gambling or to any thing where I act out obsessively and compulsively that is my problem. The problem is not in a bottle or in a pill, but inside me... When I accepted this, I was able to fall into the solution...
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
if the problem isnt in the pill and it is in me. deos that meen that there my come a day when i will once again be able to take the pills for their proper medical use? what scares me the most is that my back pain is only going to increase as i get older and because i developed an addiction to the only solution that ever seemed to work for me, i will just have to learn to deal with the pain. if i deal with my addictive personality, will i once again be able have the pain reliefe that pills gave me?
as you start to go to meetings work the steps and grow in recovery MORE WILL BE REVIELED I out that in caps cause there is a chapter in the basic text that is called that and it is a truth about recovery as you grow the more things will come to you. As to yoiur questions addicts can never use successfully 1 is too many and a 1000 never enough love in recovery Manon aka Rayne
I was told once by someone else (go figure) that most addicts can't read a perscription.... I mean if it says take one every 6 hours, we take 6 every one hour.....
All joking aside..... Being clean does NOT make us heros....
Alright, I am not going down the "we" road here..... not all addicts are the same, but my experience is I have to go to the doctor and get meds for my illness. I take them as perscribed, and do everything I can to co operate with my doctor for a non addictive, non narcotic or otherwise addictive medication. For me, pain meds are real easy to slip into, so unless I REALLY need them, I'll live on aspirn, or some other non narcotic relief, (and yes there are NON NARCOTIC PAIN KILLERS). Sometimes tho, cause I am an addict, I want more than just pain relief, I want the pain to go away. This is to me a non rational thought based on my addiction that it isn't good to feel anything. I mean, I don't like feelings, especially the bad ones.... stuff like pain, anger, depression fear, and so forth. God forbid I actually feel joy, happiness, peace, serenity, and comfort, I'd probably have to have some type of drug to cover those up too.
Man, I don't know how helpful this is, but it certainly reminds me how easy it would be to give up and get high. Don't know about the rest of y'all but my experience out there with drugs and shit wasn't so great. Just for today I think I'll stay clean one more day, cause the alternative to being clean sucks ass.
Peace out,
Brett
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Faith: the substance of things hoped for, the belief in things unseen
Stiffy, I can share only my experience as an individual here, might not necessarily reflect what NA as a whole has to say on this.
For me, it is me who is the problem here and not the drugs, and the problem I have is an incurable and progressive disease called Addiction, and as such, I can never successfully use drugs (be it alcohol, street, designer or prescription drugs) ever again, just like a diabetic cannot take sugar.
As for taking prescription drugs in recovery, just like Brett shared, I found that it very difficult to take these medication as they did change my mood or altered my mind. So later on in my early recovery, I started asking from my pdoc non-narcotic, non-opioid medication as much as it can be. And gave the responsibility of monitoring my dosage according to the prescription to my parents and brother, where they kept and handled my meds, not me... Still, I must admit there have been moments where I was tempted to steal it from them or ask for more than it was prescribed. And a few of these prescribed meds having been my choice of drugs in the past, I found it very difficult to say no to them when they were prescribed.
Moreover, my experience has been that sometimes I was unable to assess the severity of my painful condition, where I later realized that my addiction manifested my pain even more where I felt in more pain than there was sometimes... the mental part of my addiction always made my head scream that now the pain is unbearable and I need to pop the pill...
Again, I don't say that it is not possible to be in recovery when on mandatory prescribed meds, I had been successfully able to follow the prescribed meds too, but not by myself alone. I had to take my pdoc, counselor, family, and a couple of NA members into a network where I had to go to great lengths to be honest about my thoughts and feelings about these meds, and what is going inside me when I was on them...
Having shared my personal experiences, taking medication is an outside issue, and NA has no opinion there, neither for nor against. And being a NA member, I'm no professional too. Seeking help from a professional who understands addiction and is aware of your condition as such is what even the NA literature suggests...
Perhaps, what can really throw more light on this area for you is reading the NA booklet "In Times Of Illness" and also the chapter "More Will Be Revealed" from Basic Text. And I would like to add that I also know a few members who are years clean now and still having to take medication for there other physical or mental conditions...
My best wishes to you, Stiffy... As long as we have an honest desire to stop using and stay clean, we are doing something right... we are a miracle in progress...
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Hey Stiffy, Unfortunately, there is no alternative except total abstinence from all mind altering drugs. I wish (most of us probably do) that we could use drugs and keep it under control, we can't. Like all the good people here said the key is in the meetings and NA literature. Make it to the meetings. They are more important than anything in this world for people like us. They just might save your life. All the best, Magellan
