hi girls , i'm finally back from visitint my partents :) and am missing you here :(
So many people love you here, and we all have our ups and downs, but we, I, miss the hell out of you. You are valuable, and your struggles help us learn as much as your strength. You have given so much, we are here to give back to you if you need us.
this is what jenny wrote to me which warmed my heart and brought a tear to my eye,and now i am sending it back to the both of you. drop me a line. I care. peace and love peggy
HELLO JENNY, WENDY, SHEREE, CORY, MANON... WHERE YOU ALL AT?
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
NOT TO FORGET SHERYL, MICHELLE, MAREK, NICK, MELISSA, BARBARA... WAKE UP!!! ALL OF YA!!!
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Hey Peggy, and the rest of my friends and family here at MIP. I have been down to the desert to visit my inlaws, no computer down there. I miss you all too. I am getting a grip on things and working alot with my sponsor. I know Coryann is in my state this week, and am really hoping you Cory, come up to Eug to hit a meeting in a truly awesome NA community. Peggy, I can't wait to chat with you, and I will wake up and start contributing again, I miss the rewards I get when I give. Blessings, your friend in recovery, jenny
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We are not human beings having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings having a human experience
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Thanks Tahir, I just got home from my sponsors house, hung out w/ a bunch of NA'ers and it was fun. I am trying really hard to be honest, first with myself and then w/ my sponsor. I am detoxing again, and I exposed all my bullshit and manipulation to my sponsor and my home group and asked that I be held accountable. I have a really hard time lying, although I am a master at not telling if not asked, so I told her to ask me every day what I am doing, how many days clean.... I have sat through probably 80 meetings in the last 2 1/2 months, and today I opened my mouth and shared for the first time. I thought I was going to die. I can talk in front of people no problem as long as it has nothing to do with my truth. So, I guess, a little bit of progress.
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We are not human beings having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings having a human experience
Wow, thanks for sharing that, jenny. Truly inspiring Way to go!!!
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
jenny wrote: Thanks Tahir, I just got home from my sponsors house, hung out w/ a bunch of NA'ers and it was fun. I am trying really hard to be honest, first with myself and then w/ my sponsor. I am detoxing again, and I exposed all my bullshit and manipulation to my sponsor and my home group and asked that I be held accountable. I have a really hard time lying, although I am a master at not telling if not asked, so I told her to ask me every day what I am doing, how many days clean.... I have sat through probably 80 meetings in the last 2 1/2 months, and today I opened my mouth and shared for the first time. I thought I was going to die. I can talk in front of people no problem as long as it has nothing to do with my truth. So, I guess, a little bit of progress.
jenny since we're getting honest here, honesty was and still is sometimes the hardest thing for me to do. I have to stop and ask myself just before getting ready to lie "Why am I doing this" usually its to excite things, yeah I guess now my life is a little boring LOL but i also do it to hide things or keep from being embarassed about something. I cried about something the other day and i wasn't going to tell my girlfriend, she knew I was crying and asked me why, I was embarassed but instead of lying I told her the truth I was dumping my guts out to her was why I was going to lie didn't want to seem vulnerable to her, it actually helped telling the truth and being vulnerable.
Look at why you lie the next time it comes up and what drives you to lying, then you can make progress and get honest instead , theres a good feeling inside that goes with honesty its clean not dirty and dishonest.
Hey BigV, yes, I really hate being vulnerable, and as much as I struggle taking care of a million things myself, I have the hardest time asking for help. I know there is something to do with trust also that makes me afraid to show vulnerability, like it will be used against me some how. I know so clearly now though that I cannot medicate my pain with narcotics under any conditions, maybe I really needed to affirm that to myself. I know the worlds I don't want to visit, so I am choosing to bottom here and not there. Thanks for always being here and showing you care to your sisters and brothers in hte fellowship. I truly appreciate it. Blessings, Jen
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We are not human beings having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings having a human experience
HI PEGGY - "So many people love you here, and we all have our ups and downs, but we, I, miss the hell out of you. You are valuable, and your struggles help us learn as much as your strength. You have given so much, we are here to give back to you if you need us."
this is what jenny wrote to you and you sent back to her later, and now I send it back to you. And to JENNY too...
PLEASE DROP A LINE,
WE CARE...
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Hi Tahir, it's been a while since I posted. I have been really self absorbed and obsessed with pain and how to heal myself and reconstruct how I do life. I have to make alot of changes in how I do things, slow way down and learn self care. I am a caregiver, and avoid me in every way possible. Now I am paying for it, but I really see a light of hope and serenity on the horizon. I am learning alot about myself and seeing my HP working in my life to move things in the direction they need to go. One super great thing that happened to me today, is I found out I won a Logo contest for a NA women's retreat and my logo will be printed on t's and sweatshirts and I get a full registration scholarship! I'm really psyched, and it goes perfectly with the changes I am making in my life. Hope you are well and thanks for being here, Love and Blessings, Jen
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We are not human beings having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings having a human experience
JENNY, glad to hear from you and awesome that your logo's gonna go around in the fellowship merch. Doesn't it feel good? When I saw convention T shirts of my hometown area and later T shirts of another area's T shirt from our region, I was delighted to find the themes of both conventions that were suggested by me on them... gave me a great feeling of gratitude and joy that I was able to contribute in some way to the greater whole... Keep it going... Also, so true that we tend to ignore ourselves in the pursuit of caring for others... Today, I realize that I have to accept myself as I am, come to terms and peace with myself, love myself as my Higher Power would love me and all this means providing the nurturing and care that I need physically, mentally and spiritually in order to take care of my loved ones... If I do it at my own cost, then I end up doing more harm than good in other's lives too... Thanks for reminding me of this... Happy to know that I'm not alone who feels that way... Keep sharing your wonderful journey of recovery with us, we need you... Hugs and Love.
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
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