work it real good

evewuzframed269 · Member

work it real good

we can · Senior Member

My experance has been i need someone to talk to that understands the way i think, ie: another addict. Have you concedered a sponsor on line, maybe it would be easer for you to share with someone where you can remain anonamous. I have a good friend in the program that had a sponsor in the states they talked on the phone once a week and did step work via e-mail. It really worked for her , shes a very private person and was able to open up to someone with out the fear of people talking about her in the rooms.I know there are sites that have on line sponsors, not sure what they are but I think Thair knowes herd him share about it befor. Tharaphy is great i think outside help works well but to work the steps I personaly need a NA sponsor.

Good luck in your journey

keep coming back

Brett thomas · Veteran Member

I suppose i could give you the old horah speech about how you must do this and you must do that, but I think that just irritates the obivous, so let me share my experience in this program.

First of all, I came into the program, mad at the world, and everyone in it. All I kept hearing was go to meetings get a sponsor work the steps, but no one took the time (untill 3 months later) to pull me aside and explain to me what sponsorship meant, why I was going to meetings, and what "work the steps" meant.

In my experience, one of the main purposes of this program is to learn from others mistakes, and not have to go through the same pain and agony some of us have had to live through. These new ideas come from others in the program as suggestions about what to try to move foward in recovery. For instance, gettting a sponsor isn't about friendship, or having someone else control your life, but as a reference point and a guideline to personal experience with going through the process of the 12 steps. One can always work the steps alone, and get the same results, but why have to work twice as hard for understanding, when you can have someone share their experience with each step and have that be of benifit to you?

So, how do you get a sponsor? Well, it was suggested to me to go to meetings and listen for someone that I could relate to, and had something I wanted in their life that I was missing in my own. Then i was to ask them for their help. The first few times i asked, i was told no, for various reasons, but my first sponsor took me on and showed me a perspective on the steps I would have never gotten on my own.

Anyway, the therapy and meds, and anything else I do outside of the meetings and steps that are positive can only benifit and help me grow in the program. If i have any sugestions for you it would be to call your sponsor, even if it is to say I am alive, then hang up, every day. My experience showed me that eventually I got comfortable dialing that number and I was able to start talking to that person and develop a relationship there. I would also suggest that you continue therapy and the meds, because in my experience, it can open me up to listening to others and help me focus on the problems behind the scenes that caused me to use and abuse in the first place!

Hope this helps,

Brett

Tahir · Member

I was diagnosed for Social Anxiety Disorder in 1998, and still get panic attacks rarely though... For me, entering a meeting room itself triggered tremors in my body, palpitation, feelings of choking and giddiness, slurred speech when I had to share...

But nevertheless, I had reached such a point of unbearable pain and despair that I didn't much care about what happens to me and started walking into these crowded rooms...

And to reach out and ask for help was in impossibility for me, something as humongous as climbing mt.everest... But I somehow opened my mind and tried it out too... Desensitizing myself through exposure to these meetings, honestly opening up inspite of my reluctance (both voluntary and inability) with my Sponsor... all this started working... Now I'm much more relaxed at meeting rooms (even though I don't do speaker shares at conventions since I got a panic attack a year back in the convention at the Himalayas), and yes, my current sponsor is an online one, eSponsor, and it is working well for me... I would be glad to forward you the link to this list of eSponsors available along with their email ids... Just PM me, evewuzframed269, if you would want to check it out...

As for meds and therapy are concerned, I can only talk for myself. I made use of all that I can, build as much support system for my recovery and wellbeing as possible... And Talk Therapy did help me overcome my Bipolar and Social Anxiety to a large extent...

Tahir · Member

Also, try out the Step Work Board here at MIP where you can work your Steps with the group... The link is http://www.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42763

BigV · Senior Member

I have an anti social disorder guess from being locked up in prison for so long.

I have lived alone for the last 10 years now, but I always have some kind of cat hanging around, now I have 5 LOL, I get along with animals great they seem to magnitize to me but when it comes to people I have trouble.

I also have depression but its gotten alot better, sometiomes I would spend days in bed just sick and confused often crying, lost .

Talking to others and reading what others have gone thru and what there doing today to get out from under these troubles is what helps me, along with prayer and just doing the right thing and alot of self axamination has made living with myself alot more comfortable, though it has taken alot of pain getting here.

HANG IN THERE EVE AND THE REST OF YOU

tvb3 · Member

Tahir...I would really like to have that eSponsor link. My area is small and there aren't many women. There's only one woman I felt comfortable enough to ask and she declined saying her sponsor told her she already has too many sponsees. Bummer.

Tahir · Member

Terri, since we cannot post links to other sites here at the forum (except the primary NA links that are there as "Sticky"s on our forum), and since I could not find your email id at your user profile too, I suggest that you mail me so that I reply back. You can find my email id in my user profile here at the forum.

-- Edited by Tahir at 16:29, 2007-01-18

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