what's his name...lol...jk....wants me to move back, i said no.
have had a couple of offers from program people, just really mulling over my options
looking hard for a job
going to a meeting every day if not 2!!!
working on day 20;)
i miss coming here everyday'
you's are really important to me!!!
at the library now, going to look for a basic text....had it downloaded but, no computer cept for the library, one hour limit per day. grateful to have that
i have a job interview tomorrow, not sure if i want it though ,will check it out and keep my options open in the meantime
trying not to think about xmas!!!! broke but not broken...lol...just bent...ya know the saying,,,,bent but not broken?? ya...gettting better everyday
have had some nasty cravings, keep seeing myself in the act of using, nasty!!!!! i just try to put my mind elsewhere,
been praying lots to have this obsession removed
one day at a time!!!!
i feel pretty good today despite my circumstances, guess all in all i'm where i'm supposed to be eh?!
you sound from your post that you're doing, and feeling better.
you've been in my thoughts and prayers often since your last post.
i've had those pictures in my mind too. and i kick them out as soon as i realize what i'm doing.
instead, picture the worst moment you ever had while using and replace that one with the using one.
do you really want to go back there??
when i do that, it knocks those rose colored glasses off, it allows me to see the truth of where my thoughts could take me. and it's not a pretty place....
you're doing great Wendy and i'm so proud of you. you give me strength and courage.
your friend in recovery... and congrats on your 20 days , awsome!!! huge hugs peggy
Hi wantneeda, it's nice to know we all share these challenges, we are not alone. I have 5 days now, today I felt more normal than I have since I began to detox, and it hasn't been the greatest normal. I can't stop thinking about using, and my rose colored glasses are very rose. I have had so many emotions today, feel like a thousand different people. I felt alot of anger at weird things, eating, ate alot, haven't done that in months, didn't like it, but needed some form of consumption. Went to a meeting, talked to my sponsor, and another friend w/ alot of time, and felt good, but then minutes later, felt crazy insane. Yelled at my kids alot and it made me feel crappy. I know I just need to keep coming back, and take baby steps right now. I see your strength and I want to aspire to that. You have a great attitude, maybe tomorrow mine will be better. At least this day is over and I didn't make any bad choices, I just have to let go, keep turning it over, and remember we have so much support if we are open to it. Thank You, Yours in recovery 1 hour at a time, Jenny
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We are not human beings having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings having a human experience
