What if I don't even know who I am? I have built all these walls within myself even against myself, so I don't even have to face my own emotions and traumas. My own guilts and shames. The only time I could ever break down these barriers and even begin to face them and get to know who I even am and what I feel was when I was high. I am doing NA, going to therapy, and I am realizing I don't even know who I am. My parents got me addicted when I was just a kid and I have never known another way to cope. To never feel that way again and learn myself and be ok with my emotions. I feel like I am rambling, but I am really struggling and that is why it is so hard for me to stay sober. I hate who I am, and I don't even know that person. I know no one will read this but I just needed to get it out, but seriously how do you guys do it? How do you feel your own emotions and deal with the things you've done and the things that have been done to you sober? I have to block it all away and just be numb, but I am working the steps I am going to therapy I am really trying but to face everything sober seems so impossible.