Please, please, do not consider this post the start of a huge argument. I'm asking this because I SERIOUSLY need good advice from people who know what they're doing, not just anyone with an opinion.
Although I probably use alcohol more than I should, my #1 priority - by a long shot, with good reasons - is not alcohol.
But let's face it. The AA meetings are plentiful (there are as many AA meetings to choose from in one single suburb of my metro area, in one single day, than an entire MONTH's worth of N/A meetings - N/A is like a really good idea that barely exists).
The AA people are more joyful, seem more successful, they're everywhere, the atmosphere is more inspiring, the materials awesome. I've been to a number of both meetings, and for whatever reasons, the AA meetings inspire the heck out of me and seem like the place to be.
What's more, it's very obvious that 2/3 of the AA people have at least co-occurring drug usage in their history (if not just plain addicts), and it's also clear that most N/A people probably abused alcohol too.
My point is that I want to find a sponsor and get involved in a program that: 1) I can honestly commit to. (right now giving up all drinking just isn't on my honest horizon, and it's a distant second priority to the thing I need to stay clean of). 2) That is actually available, inspiring, and works.
Basically, I want to approach AA potential sponsors and honestly tell them my situation. Given the fact that I have already found out that there are MANY addicts in the AA meetings, I have to conclude that one of the following must be true:
EITHER those addicts aren't getting the help they need, and are wandering in and out of Open AA meetings but without really doing a sponsored program, OR, doing this in AA is accepted, at least in many places.
Of course many addicts use AA. After my home group meets, there's an AA meeting I'd say with 90%+ addicts in attendance. I know for a fact here in SE pa the treatment facilities direct them towards AA exclusively. And... After all how many people are drunks?
I know for a fact there's recovery in both programs . Go where you feel more comfortable. So what if you have to use specific verbiage there, or are told to NOT discuss drugs? I go to their rooms and feel home too. That's a very personal decision. Well welcome you either way.
My name's Mike, I'm a grateful Recovering Addict. I have been Clean by the Grace of God through the Power of NA since 11-27-1980. Personally I haven't been to an AA meeting in over 35 years. NA deals with the disease of addiction not any specific drug. In my active addiction you bet at times I drank like a fish. Alcohol was the first drug I used as a kid but was not my drug of choice that brought me to me knees and Surrender, which is actually irrelevant. I am an addict period. Viewing alcohol as different than other drugs has caused a great many addicts to relapse. We cannot afford to be confused about this. Alcohol is a drug and we must abstain from all drugs in order to Recover.
__________________
Work the Steps or Die MF. (My Friend :) Clean One Day At a Time by The Grace of God through The Power of NA
thanks guys, I really appreciate it. i agree, from what i can tell those who call themselves 'addicts' seem very accepted at the AA meeting place I sort of want to start calling home. my main concern was when it gets to the point where I need to actually approach someone and ask someone to be my sponsor (and I desperately need that, coming in and out of meetings isn't working for me--need that accountability help) -- I guess I'm just a little afraid of having someone tell me "you need to go to NA if you don't honestly intend/want to fully give up alcohol right now, cuz that's all I'd sponsor you for", or something like that.
I'll put aside my fear and try it anyway--again, many thanks for your answers.
As Mike has said, NA is all encompassing, and we deal with the whole picture. Some say using drugs in AA is not braking of their sobriety time. As for if you are still using, well that's on you. My sponsor NEVER asked me if I was using. All we care about is if you want to stop. Then we can help!!
What I meant though is that there are very few NA choices. Like literally probably 1/20th of the meetings/locations, etc. So even though if a person feels like "my #1 priority is the drug issue", and for various logistical reasons (like there is only one NA location anywhere near me and it's a very depressing place I just didn't like it a lot - not terrible, just, I was hoping for something that felt different and a bit happier like the AA meetings but there are no other NA choices near me).............isn't doing NA, will AA accept me.
But you know what, since then I've found something even MORE targeted, let's just say the letters look like country music awards. I'm going to hone in on it like white on rice, and beat this nasty thing once and for all. 17 years is enough.
Thanks again. I hope someday I will be able to help someone else out too.
Drug of choice crack cocaine and alcohol found a sponsor in AA with the same addictions, worked the 12 step program with him, went to mostly AA meetings some NA did service work with AA tried to get involved with NA service but it was a joke and I got told to come back another time when I went to the service meeting to give my time so I ran an AA meeting for awhile instead, mostly people sent by the judge nudge :) and institutionalized people like myself.
A few things in the NA literature really struck me personally, i love the chapter on recovery and relapse, things that changed my vision and gave me hope, I am indebted and I did a lot of service time here on this site.
So AA dont want us mentioning our drug use some are intolerant, i guess thats THERE program, Bill W and Dr Bob both used drugs not sure if they were addicts.
i say take the help where you can find help and save your ass...
-- Edited by BigV on Sunday 7th of August 2016 01:41:05 AM
I wish you well in your Journey towards finding Recovery. I am going to be honest. It sounds like you still have reservations, have not fully Surrendered, and are looking for an easier softer way. Keep coming back, NA WORKS if you WORK it. Personally I find the title of this thread Using AA out of necessity, as an N/A person to be a false necessity premise. Tens of thousands of addicts are Clean today the NA Way. And yes I consider myself successful on the inside as well as what really doesn't matter outside trappings. I have a relationship with a Higher Power whom I choose to call God who lifted the active addiction Monkey off my back many years ago and offered me the choice. The choice to not pick up no matter what. Something I didn't have before finding NA.
Coming up on 36 years Clean the NA Way I call successful. Coming up on 36 years married to the same spouse I call successful. Some falsely judge successful by outward trappings but yeah I've carried $1000 or more cash in my pocket for years, of legally earned money by the sweat of my brow when once I couldn't keep a $20 on hand. (It's stupid amount of cash to always carry around I know, it's like a security blanket and maybe a character weakness.) Once I was unemployed and unemployable. Today I'm a small business owner with 12 employees and haven't missed making a payroll ever since starting my business 9 years ago.
Today I am Happy, Joyous and Free because of NA.
__________________
Work the Steps or Die MF. (My Friend :) Clean One Day At a Time by The Grace of God through The Power of NA
Yes very much luck to you in your recovery. But here's some knowledge. You have justified alcohol as a lesser problem and that it should be ok to recover and just have a drink. TO YOURSELF. now you are seeking approval from someone you look up to. That's the sickness sweetie. Your ability to justify what you know is wrong(not healthy/sinful/distorying your life etc) to yourself. But the answer your looking to validate will never be. When you surrender when you REALIZE there is only one way and you except it. You will not care what it is. What its name is if its distorying your life and your out a control or life has become unmanageable. You'll remove it from your life.. Pills weed alcohol dope....it all makes you think feel and act differently or in a manner as to not focus on what is truely important in your life overall. Just a few moment are washed away when you have a lifetime of issues to handle. Cant function on it can't afterwards deal with it when you've forgot and they get bigger and more serious. That's why you go to your knees the pressure is now overwhelming you need help. But you can't say ok were aren't playing cops and robbers any more and keep the guns just incase.
Do you have kids? Would you teach them that here is the way to do it right but just having a lil self gratification in this is ok because blah blah even though it makes me and our family miserable.
I beg please stop and listen to yourself. You have the answer and no one can say anything that is going to change it because your only looking for one answer and thats the one that validates what you have made yourself comfortable with. Except the tough answer and toss it to your higher or highest point and get back to reality solve issues as they come keeps problems at bay. And as my mother would always say. DONT BE A COP OUT. YES MAMA LOL YES MAMA
DONT COP OUT ON THE ones that LOVE YOU NEED YOU AND WANT YOU. AA IS A STEPPING STONE. THEY CAN TEACH A NA ADDICT HOW TO SURRENDER THEIR ADDICTIONS AND GIVE THEM KNOWLEDGE ON HOW OTHERS HAVE RECOVERED AS WELL AS HOW TO GO ABOUT THEIR LIVES CONFIDENT THAT THEY CAN REMAIN SOBBER.
GOODOS I NEED AA. SOMEONE IS THERE JUST BUSTING TO SHOW THE WAY. WHAT A BLESSING FOR ANYONE. ITs TOTALLY UNINHIBITED SUPPORT AND UNDERSTAND. A WAY OF LIFE NOTA LECTURE. THE
FEREEDOM OF EXPRESSION WITHOUT THE FEAR OF CRITICISM. WELL SORRY.. MAYBE I NEEDED SOME HELP TONIGHT. THIS IS WHAT I KNOW. ALL I KNOW.
NOT THAT IT MATTERS CUZ ITS ALL UP TO you. Did I answer the question?
You already have it sir cuz you if you thought that it was ok to drink a little in recovery you would be asking.
SURRENDER give it up because you can't make sense out of nonsense.
Do what works for you. When I got clean in 1984, there were very few NA meetings around, so I had to go to a lot of AA meetings. Same thing happened when I moved out to Wyoming some years later. Just make sure to be honest with yourself that you have a drug problem, not just a problem with a particular drug.
