"It makes a difference to have friends who care if we hurt."
Basic Text, p. 54
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For most of our problems, the solution is simple. We call our sponsor, pray, work the steps, or go to a meeting. But what about those situations where the burden is ongoing and there's no end in sight?
Most of us know what it's like to live with a painful situation--a problem that just isn't going to disappear. For some of us, the problem is an incurable, life-threatening illness. Some of us have incorrigible children. Some of us find that our earnings simply don't cover our living expenses. Some of us care for a chronically ill friend or family member.
Those of us who have ever had to live with an unresolved problem know the relief that comes from just talking about our problem with our recovering friends. We may get some comic relief. Our friends may commiserate or cry in sympathy. Whatever they do, they ease our burden. They may not be able to solve our problem for us or take away our painful feelings, but just knowing that we are loved and cared about makes our problems bearable. We never have to be alone with our pain again.
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Just for today: Those problems I can't resolve can be made bearable by talking to a friend. Today, I will call someone who cares.
...sooo true. In the recent surgery recovery I'm going through,,I know the visits, support, listening, sharing I've had with people has made a huge difference. I cannot imagine the loneliness and difficulty I would have gone through on my own, nor how different some outcomes would have taken. Just one visit a day helps focus the day,,a beautiful distraction to a painful time.
I'm very lucky., the meditation group I've been part of,, a fair number of people are gaining in years, decided to work up a 'graceful transitions' focus,,where a conscious effort is made to step forwards in support of each other in times of need. When the idea was brought up, it was simple and obvious that all would gain through co-support like this. This alone is a big reason for anyone to get out and join society,,,learn to meditate or pray,,,something soft,social, make some friendships.
Although I've been part of this group on and off for some years, it's through this experience that I've come to -really- get to know some folk,,,to build a trust,,a friendship. The group focus of giving,receiving, sharing self perpetuates. I know I'll be on the other side of this gift sometime,,looking for ways to grow and share the love I've felt.
I've never found it easy to be a 'social' animal,,always a 'loner'. In addiction recovery we learn new ways to give and receive and support each other. In doing the steps, I was promised I'd find a new way to live, and gawrsh knows it's......TRUE!!
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...gawd,,,please don't let me -ever- forget why I came here in the first place!!(my 'senility' prayer)
