In seeking a sponsor, most members look for someone they feel they can learn to trust, someone who seems compassionate
IP No. 11, Sponsorship, Revised
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The idea of sponsorship may be new to us. We have spent many years without direction, relying only on self-interest, suspecting everyone, trusting no one. Now that were learning to live in recovery, we find we need help. We can't do it alone anymore; we must take the risk of trusting another human being. Often, the first person we take that risk with is our sponsorsomeone we respect, someone we identify with, someone we have reason to trust.
As we open up to our sponsor, a bond develops between us. We disclose our secrets and develop confidence in our sponsors discretion. We share our concerns and learn to value our sponsors experience. We share our pain and are met with empathy. We get to know one another, respect one another, love one another. The more we trust our sponsor, the more we learn to trust ourselves.
Trust helps us move away from a life of fear, confusion, suspicion, and indirection. In the beginning, it feels risky to trust another addict. But that trust is the same principle we apply in our relationship with a Higher Power--risky or not, our experience tells us we can't do without it. And the more we take the risk of trusting our sponsor, the more open we will feel about our lives.
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Just for today: I want to grow and change. I will risk trusting my sponsor and find the rewards of sharing.
In finding my first sponsor , I looked for someone who was compassionate and that I thought I could trust. I had a choice of two men that were kind of my mentors in the beginning . One went on to sponsor me for 7 years until his job changed and his hours did. We are still great friends and I call him weekly to talk and go to events with me .My new sponsor lives in Canada and yet we have never met we have a great relationship.