So I started reading the basic text yesterday in preparation for a meeting I was supposed to attend tonight. It would have been the first meeting I went to, and I've been agonizing over it all day. I spent over an hour, I believe, talking to Dusty on the phone trying to get myself in the right place to not be so anxious. It was an open meeting too so my husband was going to not only drive me there, but also attend the meeting with me. We drove twenty minutes out to this place and... no one was there. It was a dark and empty church. All the hype I put behind it today, all the worrying I did, was for naught. I'm extremely disappointed. I'm going to try to attend another meeting in another nearby town on Thursday, but I just felt the need to vent my frustration to a community that's supportive.
I feel your frustration.
This has happened to me before quite a few times (it is not common but I've been clean for 29 years, so you see a lot over time).
This is why it is so important for us to maintain an updated meeting directory.
Sometimes meetings stop meeting or they change locations, and they don't change the directory, and then this happens.
I'm so sorry this happened and I hope you are able to make it next time.
I know that it had to be dissapointing to finally muster up the courage to show up to a meeting only to find out that there was not going to be one, but what is important here is your desire and willingness to want to go and the fact that you took the "action" to get yourself there to the meeting. You are not responsible for the outcome...only for doing the footwork.
Did you learn anything here in all of this? Also...what step did you work here and what Spiritual Principal did you apply here? I know that you are new to all of this but it's good to get started from the get go on understanding the Steps and the Spiritual Principle's.
Let's run it down here: The Step that you applied here was the 1st step in admitting that you are "Powerless over your addiction and that it's making your life unmanageable" and that is evident in you choosing to go to a meeting where help can be found. The Spiritual Principle behind this was.....acceptance, open-mindedness, willingness, honesty and surrender.
The lesson here: "Keep it in the Moment". You spent the whole day in anxiety, apprehension, and fear in anticipation of something that never even took place. That is so much wasted energy (from a negative side) that could have been focused towards something on a more possitive side. We have no control over what's down the road, around the corner, thru the valley and over the hill. We only have "THIS" moment and what we do with it in the here and now.
Proud of you for taking that first step in trying to get to a meeting. That speaks volumes. You are well on your journey to finding and discovering a life better than you ever thought possible. Keep coming back...and get to a meeting. SMILE!
-- Edited by Dustina ILia on Tuesday 17th of December 2013 09:31:50 AM
That had to be very frustrating, don't give up find another meeting and go . Even at a closed meeting bring your husband , he is your support.Look up the hotline number for NA in your area , they should have a listing for other meeting or the website for your area of NA . Keep Coming Back .
Yeah, that really sucks.
It's so importantant to keep the doors open, but when all is said and done
the people who run the meetings are sick and suffering addicts.
If you go to NA.org and follow the links for "find a meeting"
you will notice that they encourage calling the area help line to make sure the meeting you are looking
to attend has not moved or closed. This is a good idea. Of course people have called helplines, left messages,
and never gotten a call back...(see line 3 above)
I can only encourage you to keep at it. You will find some meetings, and there will be some good people at these meetings.
Ask for help, connect with the women, and trust that even with all it's pitfalls, NA works.
I am so sorry. I have had that happen to me stateside and overseas. More often overseas than here.
But we are all addicts.
I won't lie, I have a hard time getting my happy ass out of bed to open the morning meeting I am responsible for.
Hell, we have actually had the opener oversleep.
Also had others go back out and they had the only key and that sucks also.
But one other thing is that all you need is two addicts talking and that is a meeting.
Keep coming back.
Hugs,
Sarah