Help for addicts begins only when we are able to admit complete defeat. This can be frightening, but it is the foundation on which we have built our lives.
Basic Text, p. 22
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Most of us have tried everything we can think of, exerted every ounce of force possible, to fill the spiritual hole inside us. Nothingnot drugs, not control and management, not sex, money, property, power, or prestigehas filled it. We are powerless; our lives are unmanageable, at least by ourselves alone. Our denial will not change that fact.
So we surrender; we ask a Higher Power to care for our will and our lives. Sometimes in surrendering, we dont know that a Power greater than ourselves exists which can restore us to wholeness. Sometimes were not sure that the God of our understanding will care for our unmanageable lives. Our lack of certainty, though, does not affect the essential truth: We are powerless. Our lives are unmanageable. We must surrender. Only by doing so can we open ourselves widewide enough for our old ideas and past wreckage to be cleared, wide enough for a Higher Power to enter.
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Just for today: I will surrender unconditionally. I can make it as easy or as hard as I choose. Either way, I will do it.
I know I had to admit that I had given up on recovering from using.All that I had tried failed . It worked while in Rehab or Detox , but a day or two later I was on the downward spiral again. We had to admit our lives were out of control. That we were powerless ,our life is unmanageable , and we have to surrender to make it better.It won't come easy but it can be done .
The surrender part is not to difficult, it's the 'unconditional' part that I often have a problem with.
It seems that my will just keeps creeping back into the picture. Not in a good way mind you, but it's there all the same.