A wonderful share, reposted with permission.
When we question whether or not we are worthy of something it is important at that time to shift into gratitude.
We all know what its like to finally get something we want, only to find ourselves feeling as if we dont deserve it. Whether its a car, a new job, or a date with someone wonderful, we suddenly feel as if we are not up to it. Something in us wants to reject this gift from the universe, perhaps because it requires that we think of ourselves in a new way or makes us question why we should have something that others dont have. If these feelings of unworthiness are not consciously acknowledged, they can lead us to sabotage ourselves out of the gift being offered.
Perhaps the best way to avoid rejection and sabotage is to simply shift into a state of gratitude, bypassing the question of worthiness altogether.The question of whether we or anyone else deserves something is not really in our jurisdiction. These themes play themselves out in ways we cant fully comprehendon the level of the soul, over the course of many lifetimes. What we do know is that the universe has its own way of shifting the balance over the course of time so that all things are ultimately fair. We can trust in this process and understand that when a gift comes our way, it is because we are meant to have it. Otherwise, it would not be available to us.
Accepting the gift with gratitude and using it to the best of our ability is true humility. When we receive a gift and find that feelings of unworthiness crop up, we can simply acknowledge the feelings and then remind ourselves that they are beside the point. We might say to ourselves, I am meant to have this. As we allow ourselves to accept the gift, we might feel tenderness in our hearts that naturally shifts into a deep feeling of gratitude. As we sit for a moment, consciously holding the gift in our hands or in our hearts, we say yes to the universes many blessings, and we also say thank you.
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Hey Raman,blessings of this day! Thanks for sharing that.
Kind of reminds me of what my moms showed me early on in my life about acceptance..In any given situation she would offer whatever it was and I would say no,thats okay ,I can't accept that...Eventually after I learned to be grateful,thankful and immediately know in my heart that accepting "gifts" from others also is a blessing for them to be able to share what they could..My moms (the universe :) would then say....Okay this Is what i'll do and look me in the eyes and say"thats once'!!! My wife also acclimated to this small but valuable little lesson of life when I would offer her "whatever" she would say NO,thats okay.....Now when I say "thats once" she laughs and graciously accepts with gratitude helping us both.. This is a little different then the situation you describe my brother but I definitely identify with the concept.I have been blessed to not spending too much time in the "unworthiness realm"(mostly during my active using years,but I would rationalize that away!!!!! Stay blessed my brother ,good to hear from you ,as always in support and prayer!!!
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
I think low self esteem is a condition common to most addicts. So when things start getting better we often question it. Phrases suchas "when is the next shoe going to drop" Or, " I don't desrve this [good] thing" are frequently heard. The fact is that if your higher power is loving and caring (as our literature suggests) then you absolutely do deserve all the blessings and gifts this world has to offer. Just keep doing the next right thing and you are doing His will Great thread Raman.
hey Mike and Don....
This morning too, there was an incident.
I sang a karaoke in a musical instruments shop. Then there was applause and one of them said "excellent".
My first thought was "no it cant be" but i immediately shook his hand and said
"thank you".
The only way to beat low-selfesteem is to do "esteemable acts".
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Thanks for reminding me about 'esteemable acts' I remember when I first heard that expression. I thought about it for days afterward. At some point I decided I was going to do esteemable things and see what happened. It took a while to incorporate this principle into my life. But it led to a wonderful transformation. I started to like myself. I began to notice that i was less angry, less remorselful. I was happier. There are many gifts we receive when we turn our will and our lives over to a power greater than ourselves. More will be revealed.