Hello, like everyone else here, i am in need of support. i am in need of people who understand what it is like to live daily with severe pain and takes narcotics to manage the pain.

I have been an opiate user for about 16 years now and while I take it for pain, i have become a slave to it and i want it to stop.  but my catch 22 is that if i stop the pain meds, the pain rears its ugly head. we all can think back to the first time we all took a pain pill and remember what that feeling was like, right?  that sweet relief from the constant ugly pain.  well, for me i take them because of severe pain but now i (like many) have become a slave to it.  all i ever worry about is when can i get my next refill or get to my doctor appointment.  but even that being the case i never took them for the "high".... i spend my days in pain - constant pain.  for some reason the drs do not want to treat the cause, only the symptoms. i have had many tests done and they can't seem to find the problem.  sigh!  i have been told it is piriformis syndrome then it was spinal stenosis and sciatica and the final result is fibromyalgia. (which i think they threw out there just to give me a diagnosis).

i am in no way justifying my using, but a person can only take so much pain day after day before they become desperate for relief. there are times where i wish it was just a drug abuse problem and that i oculd get clean, (which is no easy feat by no means, not am i making light of using for recreational purposes) but the problem lays with the pain.  i broke my back about 15 years ago and that started my downfall and led to other symptoms  now mind you, it doesnt sound as bad as that, i had fractured a small bone in my back.  none the less, i have level 8 pain everyday, day in day out ... no relief ever.  at first the pain meds helped but then i needed more and more, then the doctor put me on something stronger.  at one point i was up to 20 lortabs a day, along with ms cotnin...

i self admited myself to rehab and did okay, but then the pain started again...  and now, i can either live my life with pain or go back to taking pain meds.  but what is even worse is i have a 6 year old boy who needs my attention and does not understand what mommy goes through.  really no one understands unless they are going through the same thing i am and that is why i am here.  my husband tries to relate to my problems, but he has difficulty dealing with me being in constant pain.  i have lost count with as many fights as we have had about this, so i am turning to people who can relate to my situation. 

so here i am -- hello everyone

Hi Jennifer.
My name is Raman and Im an addict.

At age 51, Im really experiencing the wear and tear that sets in, a natural thing. Pain is an everyday problem.
Add to that, the damage done to my legs, from the knee down, a consequence of nerve damage during using times.
Nary a day passes without there being pain either in the heel, sole, knee or the calf section and on both legs.

The way Im coping is to add lot of iron(spinach), protein (fish, eggs and pulses), calcium (milk) and vitamin capsule supplements.
Those actions, supported by exercises and walking, stretching, doing yoga and wearing good footwear has kept me from medicating.
My aim is to prevent the onset of conditions that would require medication, and by the Grace of God, Ive been able to stave off that eventuality for 10 years now.

And having said that, although I do not have exact "medicating" experience to share with you, Id like share a secondary experience, in order to support you in your recovery. A sponsee of mine, with a chronic pain condition is easing off medications with alternative approaches like accupuncture, massage and Meditation.
From a very pained state, he is now gradually improving and these past few weeks have seen him show remarkable signs of being at ease. Needless to say, this has made his recovery more meaningful.

Thanks for letting me share. I sincerely pray to Higher Power for healing of injuries sustained.

((((((((((((((((((((Gentle Recovery hugs to you)))))))))))))))))))