a friend of mine, of 30 years, who was witness both to my addiction and recovery dies yesterday .
I couldnt attend the funeral as I had to set up and play a wedding.
Strange feelings, when i think "Ill never see Inni again".
The guy was one of those whod genuinely say "look what using drugs is doing to you."
Then I lost contact. Later in my life, I met up with him again. He was an auditor by profession and for the past decade has been doing my income tax, what little it is ! Im greatful to be doing tax returns as it makes me feel a responsible and productive member of society. Im greatful to the guy for having saved me lots of money, legally and also doing my work for nominal rates.
We had a funny friendship, blow hot, blow cold and both of us being tempremental, we understood.
Then my friend had health problems, both mental and physical. He began using alcohol and sleeping doses but kept that hidden from me. He was a terrible chain smoker too. Slowly, wisdom prevailed on him and he attended meetings and also the local area convention. But last month a leg problem turned gangerous due to diabetes and he popped lots of downers to hold the pain at bay and to sleep. Our minds and bodies dont know the difference bewteen drugs prescribed by our docs and those was write for ourselves. The result is obvious; addiction had him by the neck, he avoided meeting me and other well wishers, he went to an isolated place, took a great load of sleepers and died....
My his soul RIP, at least he did meetings and knew,, didnt use the option to stay clean but that was his choice !
Reminds me that addiction has not changed and that an addict like me, never has to use again, no matter what, just for today !
So help me God !
__________________
Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
My condolences for your loss and the loss of an addict who could not remain in the solution and was taken in the grip our devastating disease. As we are told ,for us,recovery doesn't exempt us from having to live thru painful situations.We may face the loss of a loved one or end of a relationship etc..WE HURT! But we get thru our pain without using and continue to seek the presence of our loving,caring Higher Power. WE learn to grow in spite of our pain......God bless you Raman,and God bless each one of us.....
__________________
Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
thanks Mike,,, in fact as of now, my body is aching. Im not certain why, but the possiblity of the arthritis acting up is real. Im not on any medications, and believe it or not, Im doing Meditation, walking, Yoga and allowing God to handle the pain.
__________________
Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
