Am new to this board. Free based cocaine for 2 years, now c/s for 12 years thru 12 steps. Also have bipolar disorder. Am retired psychiatrist. Am working step 12 -but also re-working all steps -
Would be glad to offer help, sharing, wisdom, my story, and answer any questions I can. Can also be ( if allowed thru site) - an INTERNET ONLY sponsor for men.
Blessings for everyone's continued success in recovery !
You are so so right - we HELP EACH OTHER to recover !!!!!
In my case, I became a free basing cocaine addict at age 56, after 25 years of psychiatric practice. AND working with addicts !!! - - -I got started after a hospital dispute, losing my position, my wife and daughter moving out, I could not stay home alone. Went out - met a woman who introduced me to cocaine. After the first time I used, I KNEW I WAS HOOKED.( I also had Bipolar disorder)
Man - I thought I had found NIRVANA!!! I was NEVER SO HIGH in my life !!
I NEVER snorted, I wanted the real deal effect - RIGHT AWAY ! Right into the lungs !!
From then on , I kept using at first once or twice per week, then daily. Later,
Hanging out in a "crack house"- - - I also found a contact for the real deal powder - and cooked it myself - to smoke.
I wound up spending all my money on cocaine. I lost my, family, job, house, car, insurance. I used daily for 2 years. My car was stolen by a drug dealer, totalled in a robbery, ( put on fire ), no longer had insurance to get replacement car !
Finally, desperate and hopeless, I tried to kill myself, by taking 100 phenobarb 30mg tabs + lots of booze. On an EMPTY stomach.
The only reason I din't die - the lousy inferior quality generic phenbarb didn't get well absorbed thru the stomach.
I was saved by GOD. working thru paramedics.
After awakening from coma in hospital, I realized GOD, did not want me to die quite yet. From there to commitment in mental hospital, doctor's recovery group, relapsed, sent to rehab 30days, came out and relapsed, sent back for 40 days, then to men's recovery home, left and relapsed. Found 12 steps true meanings and have been c/s ever since. Now c/s 12 years.\
BTW - I have more to tell later, about the "recovery home" but enough for now.
Blessings to you all and may my story help you in recovery !
-- Edited by irab on Monday 3rd of October 2011 02:55:29 PM
-- Edited by irab on Monday 3rd of October 2011 02:56:53 PM
-- Edited by irab on Monday 3rd of October 2011 02:58:01 PM
