So backing up to my post in mid-August... after returning from LA, I decided to quit crabbin' about life and do something different.
I decided that hey, I'm young, smart, and motivated. Let's try something new. So I'm taking some chemical dependency courses (an intro class and a pharmacology class). I'm a little weary about "prostituting the gift," but after seeing the idiots that want to become CD counselors (not judgmental at all), I think I might stay. Not to mention I'm still at 100% in both classes.
What baffles me is:
Recommending addicts to go to AA meetings. NA is grouped with "other 12 step fellowships" for "other addictions." WTF?! What's the solution here, folks???
Treatment talk. I've always hated it, but I have to accept where everything's at... I can't change the world today, but I can in little pieces... Oh and my overinflated ego needs to be kept in check sometimes here, too...
Only 4 addicts in a class of 25. The rest are normies or folks that need al-anon/nar-anon because all they want to do is "fix" all of us "broken" folks.
How can a treatment counselor that's a normie help someone through the steps? The steps are all about sharing e, s, & h. Makes me kinda sick.
Honestly, I have a special place in the bile of my stomach for treatment centers. But here's the deal. Just like most of everything in life, if you don't like something... do something about it! If you can't do something about it, then shut up and accept it! So I'm trying to do something about it. :)
Anyway. I'm thinking if I still like this by the end of the semester, I might just skip over to grad school. There's an online program through a college that's about 3 hours away that looks pretty decent. Total cost for the program is less than one year of my undergrad (prior to fees). I don't have to be a licensed counselor to do it and can take a slightly extended program to get caught up.
Still smoke-free for the most part (smoked like 3 in the last 50 days... quite an improvement!). I'm all about progress not perfection with this one. It's really hard to go to meetings and not crave a cigarette.
Oh, and we're refinancing the house, which means we're staying local... no move to Portland in the near future anyway.
There is a world of difference between recovery through NA and substance abuse treatment. It is important for me to remember that they both have their purpose and their place, but they are not the same and don't need to be.
Hey Amanda ,thanks for sharing.Yep there are many different roads to recovery and we have to find our way .Being a counselor of any specific place could get confusing.Back around 20 years ago I was having problems at my job and I was thinking of going for CAC degree at college just to get out of the posittion i was in. Bad idea, first of all I am an addict,secondly wasnt really doing for the right reason so i weathered the storm and still am in position i was 20 years ago(manage a workshop for people with disabilities)Even at meetings we find those who have a blurred idea of what our programs are about ,addicts sharing sober, alcoholics sharing as ANDA'S(alcoholic and addict)so many different recovery programs teaching so many different ways,not even to mention DAYTOP,transition programs,recovery by the beach,behavioral programs RSS ETC.Stay guided by your Higher Power and feel with your heart you'll at least be getting different viewpoints on different ideas.We all have to find our own ways.must be a load off your mind not moving ,we are just the opposite,getting ready to leave all,steppin out on faith,not mucH $$$ ,no jobs but we have our family and God so thatswhat it will be and head south!!(wife wants to be by her family) Good job with the fags,when i left armed forces in 1970 i was burning 3 packs a day on top of everyhing else I was using.,.it was my first addiction at around 10 years old. cold turkey and quite awhile to remove all the hand stuff(what to do with them),after eating,feelings etc....now i am gagged by cigarette smoke.imagine that..progress as you say, if you want it you'll do it...see ya.peace.
__________________
Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
