Hey all, My name is Melanie and I am an addict. As of now I have been clean 39 hours and the withdraws aren't too bad but bad enough for me to freak out about it. For people to notice I am shaky luckily I have been sick for a few days so I blamed it on being weak from being sick.
I am hoping to find some friendly fonts/faces on here as I have no support from anyone from my friends and family. If they were to find out I fell back into this and in the manner at which I did it I would be done, disowned, scrutinized for the rest of my life. So, I am alone.
I was clean for a few years back in 2006-2009 well, unfortunately not completely clean as I do have medical problems which I have to take pain meds occasionally for, since I am allergic to so much but never had any issues or wanting to get more since I used them very sparingly because I wouldn't allow my doc to give me more than needed to take care of what was going on. Until a so called friend of mine introduced me to someone, this woman sells her script and I was hooked. So, since fallish 09 I have gotten them off the street since I also do not have insurance. That is a new alltime low for me. I am so ashamed of myself for doing it.
I have a ton going on in my life and I am just adding to the aggrivation by doing this on my own. I have been in worse situations before.. I'm sure I can do it again but right now it just sucks.
Sorry for babbling like a complete idiot and thank you for reading...
I was clean for a few years back in 2006-2009 well, unfortunately not completely clean as I do have medical problems which I have to take pain meds occasionally for, since I am allergic to so much but never had any issues or wanting to get more since I used them very sparingly because I wouldn't allow my doc to give me more than needed to take care of what was going on. Until a so called friend of mine introduced me to someone, this woman sells her script and I was hooked. So, since fallish 09 I have gotten them off the street since I also do not have insurance. That is a new alltime low for me. I am so ashamed of myself for doing it.
Welcome.....Ours is a program of complete abstinance from all mind and mood altering drugs. Now you know why. You can't play with this disease....It's a matter of life and death. Thanks for sharing and keep coming back
"when we use drugs in one form or another, we release our addiction all over again" Basic Text NA Welcome Melanie...
Freedom from fear will be granted to you as you trudge along this wonderful path called recovery. Your real dreams will come true and you will love the kind of life NA offers.
However, there is no way or path to being clean, either we are or arent... This day, I choose to stay clean, no matter what so help me God...
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Welcome to MIP! Thank you for sharing from your heart.Remember we are told being powerless is when any driving force in our lives is out of control!I would suggest finding an Narcotics Anonymous meeting near you and reaching out for support(sponsor,literature ,other recovering addicts etc)You say you dont want others to know but if the monster takes over it sure will be pretty obvious.Can't save your A-- and face at the same time...Keep coming back okay,we are here for each other,no judgement,no advice,just one addict sharing with another offering suggestions that have or have not helped them...Hang in there okay.. GOOGLE NA.ORG for meetings near you or call Helpline.in your area............
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
WELCOME...YOU HAVE ARRIVED TO AN AWESOME SITE..IT CAN HELP LEAD YOU TO FREEDOM...HOPE YOU START MEETINGS, SPONSOR AND LITERATURE READING..I LEARNED LONG TIME AGO..WE CAN'T SAVE OUR ASS AND FACE AT THE SAME TIME..AGAIN..GLAD YOU ARE SEEKING THE SOLUTION..
GOOGLE NA.ORG for meetings near you or call Helpline.in your area............
