im trying to do my 1st step in the step working guide and im stuck on answering the questions cause im not sure what to put down as my answers.. these questions for me seem so very difficult..
im more of a 2 plus 2 equals 4 person or black and white, i have so much trouble with the grey areas..
what does the disease of addiction mean to me?
means if i dont stop using im going to continue to use and screw up more of my life..
can anyone out there help and give some examples of a good answer to the question..? its the 1st one and ive been bogged down for days..
im about to pick up my 6 month clean and serine key tag in a few days, i go to meetings about 5 times a week and do believe the program is working for me but i have this emptyness in me.. and hoping getting deeper and deeper into the 12 step program will help bring positive change..
hope for some help if you could write out and example of how to answer this question would be great help..
dd
-- Edited by DeltaDube on Friday 27th of May 2011 01:17:24 PM
Welcome to NA! Are you referring to the questions in the in NA Step Working guidebook? I'm not a big fan of this book--especially for newcomers--because it overcomplicates things. I got clean using only the NA Basic Text at first, and that has worked for me for 25 years. Also, do you have a sponsor? A sponsor can help you with the steps and traditions and provide help you in your recovery.
In any case, the first step says "We admitted we were powerless over our addiction, that our lives had become unmanageable." To me this means that I cannot control my use of mind/mood altering drugs (including alcohol). I can't just do one. I always want another and another. The only way I have "control" is by not using. This also means that when I use drugs, bad things happen in my life. Financial, physical, legal, and psychological harm happens to me and other people. Also, the drugs start to control my life--what I do, who I hang out with, how I think, and how I spend my money.
Hi dd, I'm new to the forum but clean over 16 years. I'm not familiar with the workbook you mention but I can attest to that emptiness you feel... even with a new born baby I was missin something. I followed my parents to church one Sunday and I unexpectedly had it out with God, right there while the service was going on. I learned that I was angry with Him, couldn't understand why He'd let crappy things happen to me when I was younger. I didnt get the answers I was looking for in that moment but it sure felt good and a little bit of that emptiness was gone.
Perhaps thats an idea you'd be interested in looking at... couldnt hurt... prayers and blessings my friend!
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"The Greatest Possession We Have is The 24 Hours Ahead Of Us"
When i first did step one my sponsor told me to do it over. I had written wordy responses to each question. He said "think about the feeling that's behind the question and then write no more than one or two lines that expresses the essence of what it means to you. this was a great suggestion.. working the steps became very real for me. I wasn't just answering questions but rather feeling the issue the question was pointing at. do it to the best of your ability. that's all there is to it.
Welcome DD! Everyone has given you some great suggestions. I completely agree w/ Avid and Dave about "keeping it simple" When I first came into the program I thought all of those slogans were silly and very tedious. As usual I was very wrong. Like most of us I love to over analyze everything and it kept me stressed out for a very long time. I've been in and out of these rooms for almost 3 yrs now and until the last 6 mos I had never even worked the 12 steps. I am very grateful for the house manager I had in the recovery house i just left because she didn't just suggest that i actually work them w/ my sponsor she didn't give me a choice if I wanted to complete the program. Which I did. I was finally able to get all of that guilt and shame out that kept me very sick for a long time. It's very painful but also very simple and so worth it. If you start to get overwhelmed stop for a little bit and then go back and work on it some more. Like everyone said just be completely honest and do it to the best of your ability. Do you have a good sponsor you can over it with? Keep us posted and let us know how it works out. Good Luck!
Stacey
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The Will Of GOD Will Never Take You Where The Grace Of GOD Will Not Protect You
Hi DD and welcome to our family here at MIP. There are no right or wrong answers to the questions you are answering, I agree totally with Avid you just need to feel your way through them. I hope your are working thes steps with a sponsor cause you will be getting in touch with feelings that you forgot you had (well that's what happened with me) and when I worked this step using the same guide that your using, after finishing the first step I felt emptier than before I started it, that just meant I was ready for step two. Another thing I do, is to pray for my HP to be with me in this process and to help me to be totally honest in my answers. This is not a test and it doesn't matter to anyone else but you, being honest with yourself is essential to the healing process. Take care my friend and be kind to yourself.......
Hi New and welcome. It's says in a chapter (What Can I Do) in Basic Text on the first line to begin your program by taking step one. That's awesome you are working on it. That's already more work than allot of others in the program, the solution and the program is the steps. I have a similar experience as another member shared, but follow directions with your sponsor. I am not a fan of the workbook either as I worked the steps using the directions in our books. If we read the Preface page in the workbook, it gives suggestions on how to use that guide and do's and dont's. One of the things I like to point out is only wrong way to use the guide is alone, which tells me to sit down to do the work with a sponsor, not home alone writing. Note, there's no right or wrong way to do the steps, not to do them and do alone are the only 2 wrong ways I know of..One of my doing the steps, sitting down to discuss questions with a sponsor. My first time through experience steps was very quickly. As addicts we seemed to want to always focus on the grey areas of all of our books which over complicates the program. Let's try to only read the black parts of the pages.
wow thanks so much for all your inputs Dave, Kitty, Avid, Stacey, Ruthy and Free...
so many very good points.. will be working on answering the questions on paper and reviewing them with my sponsor..
well Good news tonight going to go pick up my 6 month clean and serene key tag tonight in the room.. im lucky i live in area where we have rooms to go every evening and some days 3 times..
thank you all again
DD
ps i will promoting your mip room.. a few of the people in the fellowship had never heard of it
