In your opinions, how long should a person be attending meetings before they get a sponser? Also, so you think the first 12 steps can be completed in the first year?
Hi Joyce. I think that getting a sponser is one of the most important things you need to do when you get clean and attend meetings. As far as the steps go in my experiance, they are something you shouldn't rush. To fully comprehend what it means to work each step in our daily lives we need to fully understand the step and feel the step change our old attitudes and behaviours. Your sponser will go through all this with you, but remember you didn't become addicted overnight so easy does it. Recovery is an ongoing process it's not a race. Welcome.......
Hi and welcome. I don't think asking someone to sponsor you should be based only on time. I think it's more about listening to people and speaking with them before and after meetings to get a sense of where they are at. When you find someone you feel you can open up to, someone with a good recovery message, then that's the time. They will guide through working the steps.
There is no timeline for any of this. It's suggested that you find a sponsor as soon as possible. Living clean isn't an easy undertaking in the beginning and it's great to find someone that's been there, done that. :) It allows us to not feel morbidly unique becuase most of us have been through (or know someone who's been through) many of life's trials.
As fas as getting through the 12 steps in a year... that would be fantastic, but personally, I don't know how much a person can gain by flying through the steps. Give yourself goals, yes, but keep them reasonable. When working with a sponsor, you can set these goals.
It's also HIGHLY recommended that you get a list of gals that you can call when your sponsor isn't available. Start building a network of women to help hold you up when you don't feel that you can.
You rock, woman! Keep it movin! Contact me if you have any questions - my experience, strength, and hope is always free! hehehe
a lot of good stuff has been said about this, be very careful who you trust with yourself and your person, I can tell you from experience, I have had some wonderful sponsors that taught me a lot and helped me work the steps, I have also had the reverse happen.
I know I should get a sponsor, but I get so nervous near the end of the meetings that I just walk out without speaking to anyone. I know I have to ask for help or I won't receive any. I'm glad I found an online message forum where I feel more comfortable. thank you everyone for your advice!
The Steps are never completed IMO, they are a way of life. When new I heard from some with time that if you integrated a Step a year into your life you're doing good. At 30 years Clean I understand what they meant. Recovery isn't a race, it's a Journey.
Get a sponsor as soon as you can become willing to ask someone who you see having want you want in Recovery.
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Work the Steps or Die MF. (My Friend :) Clean One Day At a Time by The Grace of God through The Power of NA
We welcome..it is suggested that one gets a sponsor and once that is done. As one builds relationship and begin to work steps. The thing I have seen folks think their are specific timeliness..they're are none this is a spiritual program. My experience is as I be open,honest and willing. The timing will be perfect..hope u have a wonderful. Day
Get a sponsor ASAP. Work the steps. Yes, you can get through them for the first time in your first year (I did) if you work hard. But recovery is a life-long process, and you will contrinue to work them and live them.
I understand about being nervous and leaving the meeting as soon as it is over. It can be hard to approach individuals and introduce yourself. If no one approaches you......well, let's just say "i get it" Just showing up at meetings is healthy. My sponsor says "keep coming back" is the most powerful message in NA I too was shy about meeting people. Here are some suggestions I have heard over the years regarding getting a sponsor and support group. Pray for a sponsor...He will appear and you'll know it. Go up to one person after a meeting, introduce yourself, and ask for his phone number. Tell him you will call within the next 24 hours and then make the call. This is a great way to build a support group. People love getting that call. Repeat at least 10 times. Share at meeting that you are new and don't know how to ask for help. Ask different people how they found their sponsor. Instead of leaving right after the meeting, help clean up. It 's a way to "hang around" without feeling awkward. Good luck and keep coming back oh, and please keep posting here. we need you.