my best friend/boyfriend for 11 years is moving back to his home state which is Oregon I am in the process of moving finaces are so messed up I am not sure I will ever catch up once the car is tagged the roomie can go back to work which he needs to do cause I can't do this shit by myself that is why I let him come and live here which so far has been stressful caue I am soul provider atm as his system cleans for UAs my son going back to his nanas which I came to realize that while he was here I was so busy helping him I forgot my hygiene and things Iwould normally do so my nerves are shot Then yesterday I re injured my back trying to do stuff I am not supposed to do so I have to call the pain doc in the am so Ican get in to find out the extent of what i have done I have nervous energy going bad so I can't sit still which is gonna make my injury worse my roomie just got onto me I am grateful he is here eveen if is partially adds to the stress with him not at work atm which is a joint prob I have to tag my old car so it ois legal so he can work and then my computer caught a virus which took another hundred I don't have I have to pay my mom back tuesday I am really overwhelmed atm just hanging on like a thread I am not a person that takes change well and there is so much and all at once I am not sure how to act my shrink is working on a therapist but damn I hate therapy even if I know it is needed I feel it just makes being crazy more real Ihate that I want to be without issues that prevent me from having a job and being a productive member of society I know I don't have to use over it but to be honest a head change would be great there is still so much to be done b4 the move and I keep putting it off to leave a place i have been in since 2003 is hard but there is just too much drama and too many ppl know my name which atm is not helping I do ;although see the positive with in the anxiety that Iam going thru thanx to a Gratitude list I wrote finally like I said just nervous aboput the change just thought I would check in and get outta my head
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Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough. Og Mandino
try too take time out for yourself even if its a hot bubble bath, or a short walk,anything to clear your head so you will be able to think and get things stright. Wish the best of luck to you remember you need time for yourself or you will go crazy.
Slow down & breathe. Change is always hard (and scary), more so for someone going through so many changes all at one time. Thanks for checking in and gotta say, agree with LeeU, your avatar kind of creeps me out and makes me a bit sad. To me it looks like whatever it is is getting it's heart ripped out and shedding a tear because of it. Hope you don't feel like that and if you do, read your Gratitude list. Peace. Keep reaching out.
