Hello AND WELCOME TO MIP! I am sorry for your pain, have you spoken with medical people,preferably versed in addiction based treatments for detox../Also I know at this point its the last thing you want to hear ,but you "only have to do this once!!!Check with clinics see if there is any help with you child while you take some more days purging your system.I am not a medical person and would not suggest anything not approved by medical people but I can tell you it will get better..There are alternate things you can take but to me that is subbing "one for another"(suboxone,methadone,etc...)Hang in there and once cleaned out find a meeting place in your area,get with others just like you ,who have found a new way to live through 'living" in the solution of our program Narcotics Anonymous.I'll keep you in prayer and hope to hear back from you. May Not be much help but definitely in support!!!

Congrats for making the choice to get yourself clean. Years ago I detoxed myself from opiates. I was too ashamed to call my doctor and I did it alone so I know the hell you are going through. What got me through was lots and lots of water, ibuprofen for the muscle aches and pains and benadryl to help me "sleep" it off.

FIRST, find the local NA chapter in your area and pick up the phone no matter how crappy you feel. Just reaching out is hard, I know but DO IT. Don't cave in to the cravings. Please, be strong. Just keep thinking about how much your life will change in a positive way without those opiates. Your 2 year old needs you. Is there someone who can watch him for a few days? ...or even a friend who could come over and take care of him while you detox?

You made it 3 days so far....THIS IS AWESOME! You can do it! For energy, try lots of B Vitamins and foods with a lot of protein. Make yourself move around and go for a short walk.....I know that's hard when you feel like you've been run over by a truck....its so hard to take that first step....and PRAY, PRAY....thank your HP for helping you through this, ask for strength, courage and guidance....get your butt to a meeting....

hugs to you.

deb

amanda819 wrote:

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Thank you so much everyone. I am trying so hard!!! I had to come clean to my husband and my parents about all the lies, that was so hard. I have a lot of support with the three of them, I have deleted numbers out of my phone so I didnt have temptation. I do not want to live this way anymore, I want to be who I used to be and not NEED a pill to give me energy, I want to live again!!! My husband is not allowing me to take any over the counter medications to help with any of my pains, he says the more it hurts, the more I will remember how bad it was and hopefully not make a bad decision again. It is harsh, but maybe it is what I need, he is trying to push me to be up all day, clean the house spotless and not dwell. His intentions are good, but wtf??????????? I am only human,
Also, as far as finding NA meetings in my area, he will not allow me to do that either, he just thinks me being around other addicts will make it easier for me to get connections... So he found me these forums online... right now, I just feel like I wanna die!

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Your husband while filled with good intentions doesn't know addiction or what it takes to get and STAY clean. Addiction is a deadly disease for which there is a known method of recovery that works. Ask him if you had a brain tumor if he'd take it out for you? Same thing him thinking he know's how best to treat addiction.

HE needs Naranon to learn how to let you deal with your addiction and recovery.

I have 30 years Clean, I am only one recoverying addict of tens of thousands. NA meetings are the cornerstone of our recovery. The theraputic value of one addiction helping another is without parallel. Indisputably evidenced in our lives, the lives of thousands of addicts free from the bondage of active addiction living a better way of life.

Tell him you NEED to go to NA meetings to find lasting recovery from the disease of addiction, if he has any questions have him call me. My cellphone number is 360-989-6658.

If he will absolutely not allow you to go to meetings, you may have to make a choice for now. Recovery and life or be controlled by your husband.

Ask hubby to read this thread...

Hello all.. this is her husband... For one, I am not controlling.. two, I am also a recovered addict.  I know all about what is going on with my wife.. I have lived it myself.. did it cold turkey MY SELF .... it can be done... you have to want it...and repair your body... not replace one drug for another... that is BULL CRAP..

so all you tuff guys that want to type and call me controlling.. hahhahaha  you have no clue... that is still the active addict in my wife talking....and minipulating you into thinking I am controlling.... I love her .. thats what I do... I have given her the world.. even through this... I even gave her this website.... to talk with other addicts that have gone cold turkey... it may suck.. hell i know it sucks.... but in the end  it is SO worth it... just knowing you accomplished on of lives hardest challenges... getting off the evil opiates or drugs in general..  I have known ever since that I am better that drugs.. and I beat them... i didnt let them beat me....

I have known my wife for 20 years, you guys dont know jack
she has been in rehab just in may of 09. and should have gone in 06... but chose to start a life with me and get help that I know I could provide to her based on personal experiances.. it has been a 4 year struggle... and finally she came clean to what I have been accusing and assuming all along.... now that she has created a substantial debt for me to ONCE AGAIN bail her our off...
and there is sooo much more to it.. i dont feel like talking all about it to everyone...

I just want my wife back... and am willing to be by her side to help her.. I got her immodium ad, fish oil, and b enhanced multi vitiams, gatorade, plenty of water, soups, crackers, jello...etc..... to help her stomach and diarehea.... the shaking legs and sweats and feeling of shame and depression.. she can deal with.. and I tell her every chance we talk about what is going on TODAY, that I love her.. (one day at a time, this i know) oh yeah she also takes zoloft.. so she will be ok....this i know...


and it is bc her husband loves her and it determined to make this last time, the really really last time....

as far as the local meetings... sorry, but addicts getting together and getting more connections, just does not do it for me....  unfortuanetly, some that go are forced to legally... some yes do go bc they want to... but my wife has a good support of friends and family that she can reach too... and they are not addicts... they are loved ones... that will help her more....

now onto my son.... her mom came over for a few hours today and tomorrrow while i am at work.. and when i am home I am taking care of him... this part i do feel bad for... my son does not deserve it.. and i have a nieghbor making sure she is ok...

ok i am done for now.... just please dont talk shiat about someone that is truley helping somone else.. your way may not be my way.. and visa versa... but my way works, and I got a good idea what is going to work for my family and my 20 year long best friend in the world....

i love you amanda and together we will get past this.... and one day know that we did it... You will beat these demons.. you are stong, and i have the faith in you....

love
ran

Mike I think you and i got our piss lines crossed here.   Lets not loose sight of the point of this site, it is to help others....meetings are good for some... and my bff aka wife aka amanda went the last time she got out of rehab...  and she did meet some recovered addicts, that were good for her.  some that were not.. life is like a box of chocolates.. forest said.. :)

I am not trying to play god.. what i am trying to do, is show amanda love and respect for her life and family... i have seen what works for Amanda and what does not... worship, friends and family work.. when those three are not with us.. things fall apart...

I know and have accepted that my wife is an addict.. i know i can not control what she does and when.  All I can do is help guide her in the right direction and support her.  you should also know that it is not just Amanda and I,... it is our son... so as the man of my family and father of our child, I am putting my foot down, and making sure this happens... and asking her everyday.. what will help you... and making the best  sober decisions to help her... and my son.  Sorry but I believe that she should try these online forums and online meetings.. and we will go from there...  now Mike dont make be second guess this... and turn this into a cock fight... this was intended to help her... and me... and show her that it can be done.. and that it is not impossible...  support her and me in this time of need....  counseling is on the herizon.... detox is the matter at hand...

"if you can think it, you can do it"

with love and compasion... we will succed and beat the demon that lays in her right now... Amanda is stronger that opiates.... and she knows it, and she will prove it... i believe in her....

AGAIN it is one day at a time.... and like it says below.. COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN AND WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.... We already know that we cant change that we are addicts... but there are things that we can change....... IF WE WANT TO...

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

 

 

something else for an upset stomach that works and isn't any type of medication is coca-cola syrup. Get a two liter bottle and freeze it, only the syrup will remain unfrozen. It does wonders for the stomach.

I think that some people with drug problems are addicts and some are not.
Addiction is a disease. There is something, a gene or other defect that makes a person an addict. ON the other hand there are people, who abuse drugs, and may even have severe consequences from this use, but are not addicts. IMHO these are the people who "quit" on their own.
Addicts, meaning those with the disease of addiction do not get better on their own, anymore than someone can exercise will power over cancer. These true addicts are the "sick and suffering" we talk about in the rooms. NO matter how hard they try, no matter how much love and support they get, no matter if they are locked up and monitored 24/7. They don't get better on their own. They are not weak, or lacking will power. They are ill and need treatment.
Most of the regular posters here have tried EVERYTHING to get clean. Detox, rehab, counselors, therapy, religion, etc. etc. etc. and of course will power. We have found that the only thing that worked for us was immersing ourselves in the program of Narcotics Anonymous.
If your way doesn't work for Amanda, perhaps our way will.
But from our point of view, it's her call.

Hello everybody.... It is Amanda again, I figured since my husband has written quite a bit I should say a few things.. First of all, I really do appreciate everyone response and caring... and thank you for all your thoughts and prayers. I want to let everyone know that this is the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life, and though I guess today was just a little bit better than yesterday, I am hurting.... It is taking everything from me but I know I am stronger than it... I do need help, I know that, and I know right now my main priority is getting through this detox and then whatever needs to be done after that so be it.

I also wanted to let everyone know that my husband, though a little controlling ( though with me as his wife I cant blame him, and hes been that way for the 20 years I've known him) he has really tried and with as much as he has been through with me, I need to remember he is truly doing this out of love. I have told him, when I was in rehab just over a year and a half ago, the NA meetings helped me the most. Not the counseling, but the meetings, and right now while I am detoxing, I am going to take his advice and do online meetings and then maybe will try a few live meetings in my area. I have realized, I cannot lay on my butt all day with a 2 year old running around. It has taken every piece of me to get up and keep myself busy, but I am doing it... cleaned alot today, made a list of things I wanted to accomplish, one being cut my boys hair, and take him for a nice walk to the park. Though I really thought I was going to pass out by the time we walked back up to my driveway I did it!

Does anyone know how long this is going to take? I mean, I absolutely cannot sleep at night. and my restless legs cause me agony... any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Oh, one more thing, today I got a call from a person letting me know he had a bunch of 30's for sale and if I knew anyone who wanted any, to my honest surprise, what came out of my mouth surprised me, I kindly said I have been detoxing now for 4 days, so please erase my number, I immediately called my husband to tell him, but it truly made me think that I can fight this,, just wanted to share that. Again thank you all so much for your continued support, though I cry every day, things do get better right??????

God luv ya Amanda, you are doing so well.... Each one of us has our own path of recovery and we do what ever works for us.... The physical pain and cramping should be just about over for you, the not sleeping thing might take a couple of weeks to settle down, warm milk just before you lay down may help, it releases a chemical in the brain that promots sleep ( eltriptifan I think it's called ) the emotional stuff that your going through ( the insanity ) can last for a while but the thing to remember is that all we have to do is make it through today and tommorow will be a little better. If what your doing is working for you keep doing the online meetings as well as the message board, try and find an online sponser that has a good amount of clean time up in NA and start working the steps with her. You can do this just believe..........

the water from boiled rice help with the bowl thing and yes coke seemed to help my stomach.you are in many prayers.Pray to draw from their strength