As we learn to trust this Power, we begin to overcome our fear of life.
Basic Text, p. 25
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We are people accustomed to placing all our eggs in one basket. Many of us had one particular drug of choice that was our favorite. We relied on it to get us through each day and make life bearable. We were faithful to that drug; in fact, we committed ourselves to it without reservation. And then it turned on us. We had been betrayed by the only thing we had ever depended on, and the betrayal left us floundering.
Now that weve stumbled into the rooms of recovery, we may be tempted to rely on another human being to meet our needs. We may expect this from our sponsor, our lover, or our best friend. But dependence on human beings is risky. They fall short of perfection. They may be on vacation, sleeping, or in a bad mood when we need them.
Our dependence must rest on a Power greater than ourselves. No human force can restore our sanity, care for our will and our lives, or be unconditionally available and loving whenever we are in need. We place our trust in the God of our understanding, for only that Power will never fail us.
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Just for today: I will place my trust in a Power greater than myself, for only that Power will never let me down.
I can depend on a higher power and on human beings, but my faith in particular humans beings must come with the realization that people are not perfect and will let me down. My higher power won't let me down. I must people able to trust people to a certain extent. Indeed, that's what relationships are all about. I trust me sponsor to listen and offer his experience, strength and hope. I trust my friends, wife--heck I even sometimes trust my teenage sons. But the kind of trust I have in people is not the same as my faith in a higher power.
My experience is that as I grow in reliance on my higher power, my reliance on people lessens. This is as good for them as it is for me. My relationships are more sincere. The "what's in it for me" aspect diminishes and I accept, appreciate, and enjoy them for who they are. Accepting a loving, forgiving God in my heart has changed me. I am happier and more at peace with myself than I can ever remember. It is Narcotics Anonymous that taught me that this was possible for me, and showed me the way. May the program do for you what it is doing for me.
Thanks for sharing your experience guys I needed this today I depend way to much on people for my needs. Seems like its easier to depend on something you can see feel and touch i'm kinda stuck there though, my faith and trust in God are growing I'm stuck in this area even though i'm constantly let down by these people. Maybe my expectations are just to high ? yeah I think thats it.
One of the coolest things I've learned about expectations is when I don't put them on people, place or things there is little or no room for disallusionment and disapointments. Hmmm, I still get disalluioned and disapointed too often. Progress not perfection. But fortunately these occurances are more in outside issues than NA and Recovery from active addiction. Yeah believe me I know, the disease of addiction is an entirely 'nother can of worms!
Yesterday was one of those occurances with an employee I had been (and may still be in the future) considering for a management position. While he was lazy and most definitely didn't do his job in many ways including a major infraction, I let it really get to me as a personal affront and responded via email reprimand harsher and less professionally than I should have.
Minutes later got an email from Lee U on an entirely different NA matter. My blood immediately ceased to boil and peace returned. God had chosen her as the messenger to help me get back centered even though I had not yet asked.
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Work the Steps or Die MF. (My Friend :) Clean One Day At a Time by The Grace of God through The Power of NA
