By surrendering control, we gain a far greater power.
Basic Text, p. 44
=
When we were using, we did everything we could to run things our way. We used every scheme imaginable to bring our world under control. When we got what we wanted, we felt powerful, invincible; when we didnt, we felt vulnerable, defeated. But that didnt stop usit only led to more efforts to control and manipulate our lives into a manageable state.
Scheming was our way of denying our powerlessness. As long as we could distract ourselves with our plans, we could put off accepting that we were out of control. Only gradually did we realize that our lives had become unmanageable and that all the conning and manipulating in the world was not going to put our lives back in order.
When we admit our powerlessness, we stop trying to control and manage our way to a better lifewe surrender. Lacking sufficient power of our own, we seek a Power greater than ourselves; needing support and guidance, we ask that Power to care for our will and our lives. We ask others in recovery to share their experience with living the NA program instead of trying to program our own lives. The power and direction we seek is all around us; we need only turn away from self to find it.
=
Just for today: I will not try to scheme and manipulate my way to a manageable life. Through the NA program, I will surrender myself to my Higher Powers care.
My first experience with the concept of surrendering control was realizing that I could not stop using drugs on my own power and that the only way I could stop was to admit that I had no control over my drug use. By surrendering control, I was able to gain some sanity.
When i truly surrender and let God exert control, my life gets so much better. Amazing that I sometimes still cling to the illusion that I know what's best for me.
Surrender is freedom. I fought for my recovery and for my life for so long, it wasn't until I let go and surrendered that my life just fell into place, it was such a relief. Trying to control everything is so exhausting and stressful, I'm so grateful for that Third step.