Thanks to you people in NA I have been clean since April 3, 1989. Since that time I've received more stuff that resulted from the simple ability to hold a job. A fine education, credit, savings, a home, a retirement plan, things I would have never accomplished without making regular meetings, a sponsor, a spiritual life and generally snitching on my disease when it casued me discomfort.
What has also happened is that I have continued some of the patterns that were in my life prior to getting clean. Basically for a long time I have done just what I could get by with as far as relationships and some sexual behaviors.
Thanks to you people I have the tools to let go of these behaviors but wasn't willing to until I had reached an emotional bottom with 20 years clean. I don't expect to be anything like perfect today but I can neglect my "Inner condition" as easily as not doing the things you told me to do when I got here; pray in the morning and at night before I go to bed, stay in touch with meetings and a sponsor and hopeully pass it on to someone else. If I don't do all of these I begin to run the show.
What surprises me is not that the program still works but how quickly practicing the principles of NA, including my spiritual practice will set my life on the course you folks suggested to me. Today if I consistently, vigillantly use the tools like prayer and meditation they can pull me out of the stagnation of my own thoughs and more easily keep me there. It's as simple as just doing it!
Thank you for staying there. I forgot as well about this message board and was really glad to get the message to check it!
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Thanks for your post! Ditto....at 19 years clean I am reminded daily that the tools that helped me get clean are the same tools that help me stay on the inner path that I choose most days. lol
It was good to hear someone talk about emotional bottoms that can be hit clean. Your not alone! Please keep sharing....I need to hear people with time that continue to do this thing and are honest about the places we can go without picking up a mind altering substance.