I am an addict of 11 years. I was addicted to crack/cocaine and meth. I have been clean for 10 weeks now and it was starting to get better but now it just seems to be getting worse. I don't know what I should do. I go to my meetings and I am in rehab I completed my in patient now I am outpatient but I am so scared. Can anyone give me some advice I need some help.
Hi Pandora,,, My God are you lucky !!!!! 11 years and you already know !!! Thats great,,, However if i read you right you have a sense of lonliness,,, that may be because there arent any recovering persons you age in the area you live ,,, or maybe the problem is you havent worked any Step yet !!! Like it says in our Baisc Text "The Step are the solution. "
The Steps will grant us freedom not only from the drugs we use but also all other drugs we maybe tempted to use thinking they are not "so bad', "they wont addict me"etc,,, indeedStep by Step you will recover from the disease of addiction itself that manifests itself in many many ways !!!! Addiction is a destructive power greater than ourselves that we need to replace with a Constructive and Loving and Intelligent Power Greater than ourselves !!!! You may first of alll want to connect with recovering addicts your age group,,,as well as others in Na groups and form bonds with them inspite of any differences that may come up,,, Remember that as long as the ties that bind us are stronger than those that would tear us apart,,, all wull be well...Basically this will be your support group....this is how the concept and practice of a home group comes into being !!!!
Next is the importance of meeetings each day .. No amount of writing or telling can suffice to impact upon a newcomer that utmost importance of daily attendance at meetings,,, this is our way of replacing our old playgrounds, playthings and playmates with new ones.. we who have tried this will not exchange it for anything in the world,,,,NA promises us freedom from active addiction and a new way to live !!! In those meetings you will hear things that will save you life and in the meetings after meetings you will form bonds that will enrich your life no end.
When I got clean i thought i was too young,,,and that too i was 27 then... Imagine i was 27 and thinking i was too young !!! The surprising reality is that for each year i stayed clean i saw that mark come down and today im delighted to hear that you are trying recovery at 11 !!! God bless you !!!!! And God as we understand in NA is devoid of any religious connections whatever,,, the only hallmarks need to be for our God to keep us Clean and Serene on a daily basis !!!
This leads us to the question of one on one support that is the heartbeat of NA !!!! When i got out of smack,, booze and crack-speed-grass etc,,, i was impressed that anyone will want to sponsor me. Thats exactly what they did, first they said a sponsor is vital to recovery and then i was guided to take one actually and thats exactly when my life actually began to change.. change for the better,,, indeed better than what i ever thought possible !!!
Our Third Step Prayer will also help no end and here it is,,, lets say it together= " TAKE MY WILL AND MY LIFE, GUIDE ME IN MY RECOVERY, SHOW ME HOW TO LIVE " Repetition of tis Prayer has wrought Miracles and mMagic in my Life,,,making me glad to be alive this day ,,
So my young friend if you need a friend in need look and you will find,, and remember if you dont happen on one near you immediately dont stop, keep looking and it will happen ,,, and if you so choose to share with someone else till then ona one on one basis,,, then im there for you till you do !!! Take Care,,, and keep posting on thos wonderful Forum !!!!
Hugs and love and regards to you Raman an addict clean and serene just for today The NA WAY !!!!!!
-- Edited by Raman at 19:42, 2005-07-24
__________________
Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Thank you so much for your input. I have worked some of the steps but I am only on step 3 which is ok because I know it is not a race. I am not a real social person so I am finding it a little hard to reach out to people thats why I like it online I guess it's alot easier for right now. Thank you so much
Youre welocme Pandora,,,, yes,, its correct we are not in a crazy race against time !!! Like they say= EASY DOES IT < BUT DO IT,,,then theres another like"TAKE IT EASY" Best of recovery and may the Blesings be for you, more and more each day !!! And as for me, i try each day to remember that the #3rd Step Prayer and the Serenity Prayer have all the answers !!! ther have been times when i use my fingers to count the number of times im chanting those wonderful prayers and have gone upto 100 odd at times !! Once i went out of town, near the highway and prayed over a resentment,,, miracles= some time later i "saw" a cloak like leaving from me,,, a dark cloak called resentment was being lifted in front of my eyes and i was a freeman !! And like it says in the TEXT= "If you pray as often you wont hurt as often" God Bless You !!!! Hugs raman an addict clean and serene just for today in the NA Way !!!!
__________________
Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Don't feel alone there is so much help out there. Don't things get to you. You might look into what i did, i don't mean your not doing good but if your having some second thoughts go to "The Coleman Institute"on line it really works take it from someonethat knows.
HI! I read your post and I just want to let you know you are not alone. I used to feel alone, but that made me stronger. I knew that if I did not clean up I would "FEEL" lonely for the rest of my life. I lost my kids because of my habbits, and I used even more after I lost them. It takes knowning to put an end to your use. I knew that If I kept using, I would eventually be dead. Without my family, or help from friends I did it all on my own. Everyone had already given up on me anyway. At one point I found myself in shelters, with no money, no food, nothing. Not to mention it was a very frightful journey. If you have already begun the process, please do not give up. There are so many places that are willing to help. I went from being an addict to a graduate in two years. I am also about to start classes in Psychology to be a drug counselor. When your clean I promise things do get better. Dont give up
