"Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry the message to the addict who still suffers."
Tradition Five
Our home group means a lot to us. After all, where would we be without our favorite NA meeting? Our group sometimes sponsors picnics or other activities. Often, home group members get together to see a movie or go bowling. We have all made good friendships through our home group, and we wouldn't trade that warmth for the world.
But sometimes we must take inventory of what our group is doing to fulfill its primary purpose-to carry the message to the still-suffering addict. Sometimes when we go to our meetings, we know almost everyone and get caught up in the laughter and fun. But what about the newcomer? Have we remembered to reach out to the new people who may be sitting by themselves, lonely and frightened? Do we remember to welcome those visiting our group?
The love found in the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous helps us recover from addiction. But once we have gotten clean, we must remember to give to others what was so freely given to us. We need to reach out to the addict who still suffers. After all, "the newcomer is the most important person at any meeting."
Just for Today: I'm grateful for the warm fellowship I've found in my home group. I will reach out my hand to the still-suffering addict, offering that same fellowship to others.
I remember when I first came to the rooms. There were a few who reached out to me, but many did not. I can recall feeling "how dare they be so happy when I'm so miserable" This self centered attitude is pretty common among newcomers. Just for today I will reach out to make a newcomer feel welcome.
Morning Don! The newcomer is the most important person at any meeting,because we can only keep what we have by giving it away!
For this purpose alone, our Monday night home group has put together really informative "welcome packets" to all newcomers with our names(first only)phone #'s and a group of IP'S voted by group conscience to go in packets with a meeting list of anyone else who wants to put their #'s down.We make an overextended effort to welcome and hug all persons entering room but with expanded dialogue with the newcomer.Most newcomers may not want to approach anyone,even know what an IP is and not know where the next meeting is.THERE IS A MEETING EVERYDAY IN MY AREA SOMETIMES 2 OR 3X PER DAY!
Our 5th tradition also states that we are to maintain an atmosphere of recovery and our primary purpose is to carry the (NA) message that an addict,any addict ,can stop using drugs,lose the desire to use,and find a new way to live.
We not only welcome but also follow up at closing with a word,hug,smile or general acknowledgement of what it took to for you to just show up and to keep coming back! Believe me ,it is not always rosy,we are addicts(self-centered,stubborn,all that etc:)but we work hard to adhere to our 1st tradition and always get back to stability,can't work without it!
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
When I got online today, I prayed that somehow God would give me a sign that I was on the right track. Then I read your post. I am pretty sure that it is for me. 7 years ago after seeing my 2 closest friends die of an overdose in a matter of 3 months I decided that if i wanted to live, I had to change my life & get sober. Long story short, I packed up my son, all of my things and left everything else I had known for 22 years and removed myself from the toxic life I was killing myself with. In a new town, away from all of my temptations, with no family or friends (except my young son), I detoxed myself (which was hell on earth), got a job and started my new life. I managed to mostly avoid situations where I could be tempted & remained stong in my faith that God had a better purpose for me. 5 months ago I met the man of my dreams and best friend. Last week after borrowing $100 from me he fessed up and told me that he was struggling with addiction and he was wanting to get clean after being addicted for 7 years...he had set up an appointment to see a Dr & he wanted me to go with him to support him. I cant say I was suprised. I think I knew he had an addiction because I could see so much of my past in his life. The Dr gave him Suboxone and he is on Day 2 with the meds & still in a living hell. He gave me a pill bottle full of Loratab and told me to take it away from him & get rid of it . At that point I realized how I too still may need help. I couldnt do it. I couldnt flush it all I could think about was to HIDE it and maybe later I could JUST TAKE ONE...or save it JUST IN CASE. I gave them back to him in tears and told him I couldnt do it. As strong as I thought I was I couldnt do it. He flushed them. At this point I feel lost. I feel like I have the world on my shoulders and its getting heavier. We will start going to NA on Friday together, but I dont know what to expect or what to do from this point. Before I did everything alone with help from NO ONE else but God & I am having a hard time being his rock while he is detoxing from his poison. I feel so lost & I feel like everything I was so proud of with my own recovery was a front, and I am still just as weak now as I was then.
-- Edited by iCOCO on Wednesday 5th of May 2010 02:26:27 PM
ICOCO! Welcome,we have been waiting for you.:) I also am an addict with a little more than 25 years of recovery and also have a now 24 year old son ,a hard core Heroin IV abuser,(since 17)now in recovery.I am a member of Narcotics Anonymous,make meetings,have a sponsor(NA SPONSOR) who has a sponsor,I share from my heart,do service and sponsor others.This program and the spiritual principles of the program has taught me a new way to live.I also am a member of Naranon(no implied endorsement)FOR FAMILY AND FRIENDS OF ADDICTS(MY SON)It is very true that your own addiction and trying to work out dealing with someone elses addiction can get very weird.I can only tell you from experience,YOUR RECOVERYMUST COME FIRST!! You can learn the tools of co-dependance and how to ;DETACH WITH LOVE FROM YOUR ADDICT BUT IN THE SAME BREATH YOUR FOCUS MUST REMAIN ON YOU.I am glad you found us here,please keep coming back and let us know how its going.Trust in your Higher Power(and hoping that you have a concept of what that is for you).If you are not attending Narcotics Anonymous I would definitely suggest you find a meeting.You'll feel the love and be with people just like we all are., One addict helping another..stay tuned more family members will be on to share with you..peace....
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
This is why i am afraid to step out of the box and try things on my own. I'm afraid that i'd fall in love with a great guy who i believe isn't useing and then be faced with temptation. It sounds to me like he's trying to get you to just use those Lortab's with him, and that is the nature of the disease. It waits for us patiently and wants us to come back to it. I will keep you in my prayers sister.
Thanks for the warm welcome MikeF! We are going to start attending local meetings on Friday. I just dont know what to expect. I have never been to any kind of meeting before. I am the kind of stubborn person that thinks I can do everyting on my own. I am a 'fixer" I try and take more than I can chew sometimes with a lot of things in life....I always trying to help other people, strangers and family. A lot of times I find that I am putting myself so far down on the list that I have negleted myself. I think the hardest thing for me right now, is having to step back and realize that I can't fix him. I have found that I still am not "fixed" myself after thinking that everything was hunky-dorey for so many years with my own addiction. All I can do is hold his hand during this journey while he is taking charge of his own recovery & that is the hardest thing in the world for me to do. It's good to be here. It really is.
PeachZ...actually no, he doesnt want me to use with him. He came to me to tell me HE had made the choice to get sober. I never had told him of my past until that point. I made sure my past was a GHOST to anyone who knows me now. He flushed the pills on his own (when I couldnt) and has made the CHOICE on his own to change his life for the better. Funny thing is, it does seem that this "devil" does seem to seek us out and find us. I never thought I would be here in the position I am today. I promised myself I wouldn't. If I didnt love him I would have told him to scram after finding out that he has the same "devil" that i chased away so long ago. But i am trying to stay positive. I think that this is what is in the cards for me. There has to be a reason. Maybe now, even though I have kept my sobriety for so long, I am finally going to get a piece of my lifes puzzle that I didnt fill in before, since I never had a support group or anyone else to talk to. Hopefully one day if I find myself with a bottle of pills in my hand I wont be able to think twice about flushing them on my own. Keep praying, I can always use the prayers.
Hi Peachz! Thanks for sharing your, definitely right,the monster is always "lurking"We absolutely must stay vigilante...It really does work if you work it!
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
Hi back Mike, no problem, anytime I can share I will. In order for me to understand recovery, I also have to know my disease and that can be unpleasent. I do like the little things in life, I also like drama and am recoverying from that, this is also a process. I was also a love junkie and a people pleaser, these things want to manifest in other areas, if i allow them to and also keep them inside and not share with my sponsor. My sponsor is so grateful that she knows me and that has taken 3 years of work to get to that point. No one said this was going to be easy, but NA does promise freedom from active addition. thank God.
Welcome Courtney, I'm really glad you found us. We need you as much as you need us. It took me a while to realize that I can't do this alone. I was stubborn and prideful and that cost me dearly. Your higher power is working wonders in your life. I'm so glad to hear that you are going to meetings. For me the program of Narcotics Anonymous is the only way. I pray for the health and safety of you and your loved one. Please keep coming back. donM
