"We learn to experience feelings and realize they can do us no harm unless we act on them."
IP No. 16, For the Newcomer
Many of us came to Narcotics Anonymous with something less than an overwhelming desire to stop using. Sure, the drugs were causing us problems, and we wanted to be rid of the problems, but we didn't want to stop getting high. Eventually, though, we saw that we couldn't have one without the other Even though we really wanted to get loaded, we didn't use; we weren't willing to pay the price anymore. The longer we stayed clean and worked the program, the more freedom we experienced. Sooner or later, the compulsion to use was lifted from us completely, and we stayed clean because we wanted to live clean.
The same principles apply to other negative impulses that may plague us. We may feel like doing something destructive, just because we want to. We've done it before, and sometimes we think we've gotten away with it, but sometimes we haven't. If we're not willing to pay the price for acting on such feelings, we don't have to act on them.
It may be hard, maybe even as hard as it was to stay clean in the beginning. But others have felt the same way and have found the freedom not to act on their negative impulses. By sharing about it and seeking the help of other recovering people and a Power greater than ourselves, we can find the direction, the support, and the strength we need to abstain from any destructive compulsion.
Just for Today: It's okay to feel my feelings. With the help of my sponsor, my NA friends, and my Higher Power, I am free not to act out my negative feelings.
I don't know if this fits here but for me not using foul language is something I work very hard on each day,Every now and then though,specially when Im feeling sorry for myself or just "tired of it all" I may just blurt out a shower of F this and F everything in sight I used to talk like that all the time and it seems like it builds up in me.Last week when I went on a 2 minute tantrum,my wife says' after she watches me rant" why do you do that"and all I could think of was "that it makes me feel good for a moment.Acting out on a negative impulse for me,such as that makes me feel like I just used,then I get back to reality,realize that I still need tons of work and I have many negative impulses cause i'm human and that Ill have to dig a little deeper..I forgive myself ,tell those around me I need to work on that and will try to let the pressure out next time before I blow the valve....
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
