hey everyone, Happy thanksgiving to all the americans out there...
Just wanted to update, I had my 2 year medallion last night and I'm really glad that it's over. I am struggling with the steps that need to be taken. I haven't been connecting with my sponsor for about 6 months and I realize that it is time to move on. The problem is that i'm scared to do so. I have this feeling that I owe her to stay with her. This lady brought me to my first meeting, showed me this program... helped heal my family. Now I know I need someone new. I was just wondering if anyone had any suggestions on how to face this fear or any experiance on what I should expect. I also feel guilty because she said wonderful things about me last night and got me a present. Now I feel like I owe her even more.
Other than that life is good, my first semester of college is almost over and I am pretty much top of my class.... it's funny how I'm the "keener" in the program....lol who would of thought.... :) andrea
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people who mind don't matter, and people who matter don't mind- Dr. Seuss
What do you mean when you say ( it's time to move on) she sounds like she's being doing right by you all alone, so what's the problem , why do you want to change to some else, is not her fault you don't call her is it? will you be calling the next sponsor more often ? what would be the difference? when you say you're struggling with the steps is it because you been abstinent for two years but haven't worked any of them? college is great and all but abstinence is not recovery and without a foundation in recovery all that good stuff will allways be in jepardy. recovery is an ongoing life process it is never over.....................
-- Edited by salvagable on Friday 27th of November 2009 03:32:04 PM
Hi Drugfree! great job on 2 years clean!First you have to remember its your recovery and if you feel you are 'not connecting" or need to move on that is your choice.My suggestions for the steps to take would just be honest with her and let her know that you feel you need to move on (for whatever reasons you have).You could thank her for all her help and let her know that just because she wouldnt be sponsoring you doesnt mean you still can't have a productive relationship.Great job in school just remember 'keep your recovery first always"Also you only"owe" yourself what you feel you need to maintain your recovery,if its a new sponsor for the reasons you have, then so be it! Enjoy the rest of the holiday weekend!
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
One of the things I have heard people do is to ask either your current sponsor or the person you want to sponsor you now to be your "spiritual advisor" It basically means that you want to designate an additional person as a trusted advisor to help guide you in your recovery. You don't "owe" your sponsor to stay with her when you think you may have outgrown her, but clearly she has been a great influence for you and you have warm feelings for her. You don't need to replace her to add someone new. It's wonderful that you are having so much success. Keep on shining. avid.
