in spite of things that have gone on recently i'm just glad most have hung around to continue sharing and caring and that makes a difference.
I continue to do the same actions over and over and i really hate myself this evening for what i've done and not been able to do which is make changes in some character flaws, just glad that i can drop in here and know someone will talk to me still LOL .
Anyhow thanks and Blessing to you all, even thoughs who have left us.
There seems to be a gratitude theme happening here!!
There are so many unique and diverse personalities here! You can always count on never having a dull moment!! Gotta Love IT!!!
A simple "thanx Carol", a genuine and loving "I have faith in you"- along with spiritual and recovery "speak"- It all tends to make me swallow hard( keep it clean guys!!!lmao) and wipe my eyes to catch that tear... The one I tried so hard not to cry! Im such a girl!
As an addict , I had worked so hard for so long not to feel ANYTHING. I remember when I first got clean how uncomfortable feelings were. Especially spiritual feelings! Old timers and my sponsor promised me that I would stop hurting so badly-physically and mentally. Someday I would actually look forward to getting out of bed!No WAY. I thought to myself "oh go get *beep*ed You just dont know how BADLY I hurt. You guys just arent in as much pain as I am" I soon realized that hey, they are just like me! When they shared, I heard things far worse than even my own situation. Whats this? No Way.... actually laughing and smiling too? I wanted what they had and in the addicts true fashion I wanted it NOW. lmao It took awhile but . Today I have it and try to keep it by giving it away...Just like my sponsor did. An ongoing PROCESS of recovery and spirituality. I still get depressed and sad. Difference is I am learning how to work through feeling that way instead of working twice as hard to deny myself that right! With God, all things are possible!!. I remember the first few months at meetings I was very apprehensive with talk of God/HP despite being raised in a strict Catholic household. I just felt weird, for lack of a better word. It doesnt feel weird anymore yet I still tend to try and stop myself from crying and blubbering like a girl!!! I guess No matter how long Im in recovery Ill always be of the female gender! tee hee hee We will always have things that cause us both physical and mental pain. Life on Lifes terms does get easier. I am....well, Serene. Happy and okay with the world most of the time! WOW. One day at a time!
Comes back around to the original idea of the post ......GRATITUDE~!!!