Hello everyone. In desperate need of a few suggestions. I just returned home from detox and then a 5-6 wk recovery house. The place was great but I am a single mom w/ 2 teenage dd's. I've only been to 2 meetings this week. Yes, i know i need to do 90 in 90 and I do plan too. My mom is staying w/ me. Sorry, i am rambling. Has anyone who has ever detoxed off of opiates & alcohol still been able to just take their prescribed xanax or am i just kidding myself? It's only been a little over a week since i've been back but I had to take a leave of absence from wk and my license are suspened so i am stuck and feel like I am about to jump out of my own skin. The Dr. has me on vistiril but it makes sleepy & in a fog all day. HELP GOING CRAZY IN ALABAMA!!!
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The Will Of GOD Will Never Take You Where The Grace Of GOD Will Not Protect You
Hello! Welcome to the board, First thing my feelings are only a medical advisor(Dr.etc)should offer you medical advise or prescribe medications.I do not believe we should be offering medical advise unless qualified to do so., but I will tell where my 24 year old son,in recovery from opiates ,is at with his meds.and maybe it will help..First of all after being clean a year or so in jail and rehabs he decided to go on suboxone maintenance when he came home(12mg per day,dropped down from 16mg after 6 months).That seems to work well for hiM.The Benzo's prescribed were a drop down therapy from zanax(which was as bad as dope for him as far as functionability(was nodding like crazy),next was Klonipin which he said didnt work at all,so he chose to stop there.He also has OCD which he was taking Paxil for, but been on for a long time and that wasnt working and his OCD really bothering him again.(He has severe anxiety and anger issues on top of that)He finally realizes now that he needs to get back to psych docs and see what meds can help but he has to do program consistently.(not self medicate)He has been on resperdal, thorazine,seraquil,paxil,jail house meds and all SSRI'S,most benzo's.He says only he knows what works for him but he doesnt do it consistently.I know doesnt answer your questions but I would suggest working with the medical program(your doctor) until you find a therapy that works and also work the "program"(NA/AA) to stay clean(try get a ride to meetings,or see if someone there could help till you get better situated).keep comin back ,many here with helpful and well meaning ideas and experience .congrats on your clean time ,any day clean for us is a miracle....try to stay in the day and in your skin peace mikef
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
Hi-I agree with Mike...only a doc, with some training in addiction medicine as well as psyche meds should be tending to your needs. Will also say I've never heard of Xanax benefiting someone with addictive disorders. I used to work specialized, hospital-based detox . For most, withdrawing from the Xanax was a real horror show. Inevitably the docs who prescribed it for mental health reasons knew nothing about the concurrent addiction problem. This was years ago and progress has been made in cross-training, but I still have to search carefully to find practitioners qualified to deal with my multiple disorders. Through it all, NA/AA/DRA is the glue that holds me together.
-- Edited by LeeU on Saturday 15th of August 2009 01:00:56 PM
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From dying and surviving to living and thriving. LeeU
Hey Lee mike here ! how ya doin?good to know you worked detox,i'll stop in for some insight if I need into all the freakin' meds goin on..Eric my son,realizes he's got to get his program straight and you can see he has been guinnea pigged trying to find the right ones (and his stop/start methods,self medicating have really been wreaking havoc on him)..24 ,he is still learning!! remember 24,my goodness!!!!! hope your doing well,talk to you on the rebound!! peace
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
Thanks for your input & honesty. I am taking my Xanax & Lexapro as prescribed by my doctor. I tried the anti anxiety meds Vistiril but all they did was make sleepy. DD's meand darling daughters. You've really given me something to think about. Thanks, Stacey
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The Will Of GOD Will Never Take You Where The Grace Of GOD Will Not Protect You
I am very sorry to hear about your son. Yes, I remember 24 quite well. lol I had my 1st child at 24. I may just try the non narcotic vistiril for a while it's for anxiety as well it just makes me very sleepy. Thanks again & good luck w/ your son.
Stacey
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The Will Of GOD Will Never Take You Where The Grace Of GOD Will Not Protect You
Hi and Welcome Stacey keep hangin in there . Sometimes a lot of rest doesn't hurt a bit at first try to relax and stay focused on what got you here every day and how to stay clean each day takes a little getting used to so its going to be uncomfortable for awhile.
Hey Mike...my daughter is like your son, and the chemical soup she was on was horrifying...almost killed her. Bordered on malpractice, as far as I am concerned. Now she's on only 3 meds (she's 35 now...this went on from age 16), that in combination are working, but it was a heck of a journey to get to that point. Unfortunately, she isn't through smoking pot and probably does some drinking, I'm sure. We're still semi-estranged, but not nearly so much as during the worst of it.
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From dying and surviving to living and thriving. LeeU
I have a chronic pain condition caused from a car accident with a "pieced together " foot and have been on suboxone, lyrica(for nerve pain) and cymbalta since I came out of rehab over 2 years ago....before this recent relapse it was working for me, and I was living a great spiritual and full life....then I quit working the program.and started taking more than prescribed(after 2 years of it working just fine remember...) so I believe that it depends on where you are in your recovery, thats just my opinion. Are you fooling your self? Can you take your meds as prescribed? exactly?> Do u ever think about taking one more to see if you can get your "desired effect>?" I am in FULL agreement that nobody here should tell anybody what they should and shouldnt take cuz we are not doctors, and every person has their own issues and needs.
I also have never heard of xanux being part of a recovery program as I was detoxed off of that and it WAS the worst part of my getting clean!!A s was said already on this board, absolutely horrible. I personally think it is one of the most dangerous things out there as It was the cause of my head on collision and I personally know at least 5 other people who have had car accidents while under the influence of xanux. THIS IS JUST MY OPINION. I would not ever tell anyone not to follow a doctors advice or that they dont need what the doctor says!! It is the only thing I still crave and think I always will....if that tells you anything.
WORK THE PROGRAM and follow your doctors instructions exactly as written I guess is what it all boils down to, Please keep coming back and get to those meetings any way you can! It IS as important as they say! Good LUCK
Hey Lee! yup,Eric just started up again.Lexapro,and suboxene only.It was his choice to go back and seek the meds,so hopefully he'll follow a consistent program this round..He still says he smokes every now and then and has a drink also but thats his recovery.He is showing signs of returning to civilization like working,not isolating,taking meds hopefully consistently ,and doing some 'RESPONSIBLE " things.He just bought a 'BEATER'CAR FOR HIS PAPERROUTE.Which is great cause he is killing our nissan...got a 95 mazda that should be better on gas...Loves his Vampire JOB.Delivering the Poughkeepsie Journal ,our local paper at night(about 300 papers) making good $$ so now we'll have to see what happens with Medicaid if he overearns,he needs the Medicaid for his medication.Always a fly in the ointment but this is a "good problem",Did you see the"60's on VH1 THIS WEEK?Brought back some memories,Abbie,Woodstock,The crap war,etc..Anywho talk to you on the rebound peace mike
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
Thank you again for your honesty & suggestions. I am trying really hard to take my Xanax only when I truly need it. I am having bladder surgery next week and that scares the hell out of me because pain pills was by far my DOC but I have to have it while I am still on my leave of absence from work. My mom is also staying w/ me to help out w/ my girls. I think a lot of my stress is from not being able to work right now & worrying about my surgery. If everything goes well it should be a fairly simple procedure but after just getting out of a hospital that is the last place I want to go. I recently changed DR.'s and he doesn't know my whole story that's how I got my Xanax back. I feel guilty about it & I won't even try to make up an excuse as to why I didn't tell him I am in recovery. I have a lot of soul searching to do & praying. Accepting & admitting I have a serious addiction problem was the easy part but the "God of my understanding" hasn't been. I just have to keep working my program and hopefully eventually spiritually everything will fall into place. I have to believe that to stay sane. I am so grateful I found this board and all of you. God Bless you all.
Thanks again Stacey
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The Will Of GOD Will Never Take You Where The Grace Of GOD Will Not Protect You
Hey Dean thanks for the welcome. I am so lucky to have found this board because of the unconditional support and being just a few days out of a recovery home it's exactly what I need. I can be reached at sstaceye69@yahoo.com if you ever need to chat.
Thanks again, Stacey
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The Will Of GOD Will Never Take You Where The Grace Of GOD Will Not Protect You
You know in your heart of hearts that u didnt tell him because you wanted that xanux. I am not JUDGING please dont misunderstand my intentions. Its hard. oh GOD do I know it! The first step is "admitting we are powerless and our lives are unmanageable" You are still there Stacey. I know in your situation with surgery and all that You cant put your full focus on the na recovery program. BUT your here and thats a WONDERFUl thing! Being honest, to me, was and IS the hardest part for me . i have said before that xanux is the only thing I still crave after 2 years so I know what a hold it can have on you! Do you have a sponsor? Are you able to go to meetings right now.? Or maybe someone would be willing to come to you if you have met anyone in your area? These are just some suggestions to help you get real with your self. I am not preaching to the choir....I myself am in a relapse but of a whole new kind and It threw me BIG time!!!! I didnt listen to my sponsor and work my program hard so it didnt sneak up on me.....she knew that it would happen, just not how. SO here i sit ashamed and still not wanting to be honest*(not completely) and the meds that I took for 2 years as prescibed that kept me out of pain but not high now are my catalist to getting numb. The guilt is astranomical. Im going to a meeting tonight.,I dont know anybody and Im scared and ashamed but I know what will happen if I dont! It will only get worse!!!!
Be as honest with yourself as you can Stacey , it will save your life I promise!
Thanks for your honesty 2ndtimearound. That's why this board is so important for us because I know for me to be successful in my recovery I need that direct in your face honesty. I won't even try to deny I wanted the Xanax. I 've only been out of rehab for 2 wks and it's scary as hell giving up everything at once. I know I am going to have to stop taking my xanax in order to truly recover. I am taking them as prescribed but i know it's still too risky and could very easily trigger something else. I can relate to your feelings of guilt & shame more than you could ever imagine. I am consumed w/ it. I am very sorry to hear your also going through a very difficult time. I willl keep you in my prayers. Yes, I am am able to go meetings but like i said it's so new to me and i am going to a few different ones until i find one i feel the most comfortable one. Take care & good luck!
Thanks for everything, sstaceye69
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The Will Of GOD Will Never Take You Where The Grace Of GOD Will Not Protect You