So it has been a while since I've been on these boards, but I haven't been going to meetings very much recently .. actually not at all. Infact I've told myself I'll never go back to a meeting in this town ever again (stomps foot and crosses arms). I know that' a poor attitude, but I was burned pretty bad by my sponsor and some other people that go to meetings. I guess trust isn't as important to some people as it is to me. I know I need to have a recovery outlet and this website is a great one. It's going to be sort of a goal for me to stick around this forum so that I don't let my recovery slide into the background.
Since when did the avatars become Godzilla-sized? haha
Check out this picture, it makes me laugh hard, and laughter is important to recovery right? So now that I have made justifications for posting this picture:
Hey Scott, welcome back! Together we can accomplish what I cannot do alone
Keep coming back, we need each other, love and hugs.
And yes, WTF is that???
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
I agree there might be a very rare few who reciprocate our trust in them, however, irrespective of others' capacity or lack there of to be trustworthy, I've found that it's very important for my recovery to allow myself the risk of being vulnerable and try reaching out to my Sponsor and a few members anyway, even at a NA meeting or at an online fellowship like this... Sharing is healing, and thus advantageous for me... what others think about me or talk about me as a result, at the end of it all, is none of my business. For a few very intimate and serious issues of mine, I can always choose to share it with one another human being whom I feel comforable with and am sure will not or cannot throw my Fourth/Fifth Steps back on my face. But hey being human, it does happen at times. And that's part of our learning/growing up too
My ex-Sponsor always reminded me that all I have the right to share what I feel ready for, at a particular moment... no hard or fast rules Trying to be perfectly honesty before it's time, I've observed, can actually be damaging... it's a process... and this process always lets us know when it's time to reveal something... it just happens when I least expect me to be doing it as a natural consequence in the stepwork process...
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Hey Scott! MikeF HERE! Welcome home,I am relatively new to this site but try and participate when I can.Another spot to keep me in contact with support group.Great photo,I think I have seen these things in my past..!!! cool mustache.....peace mikef
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Our purpose is to remain clean,just for today,and to carry the message of recovery.
a sense of humor is a great way to get thru the day I find it in a place of gratitude as well that is what keeps me going I also understand about being "burned" in my area it is hard for me to trust as well like Tahir said Keep comin back your sister in recovery
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Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough. Og Mandino
hey scott. welcome back! i have a hard time trusting people especially people in the treatment facility that i am in or at meetings. i mean we can all agree that addicts are not the most trustworthy or dependable people in the world. but thanks for sharing that.
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"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
I dont know WTF that is but whatever TF that is it looks FCrazy
HEYS Snott I mean Scott we got evenings open for a guy jus like yoo lookin to get into some SERVICE LOL lemme see that hand go up for some good old fashioned cyber NA meetings think of me as your higher power jus for a minute better put that cynical smurk away too boy put a size 12 upside yuh head LOLOLOL
ok leme know what day works for you looks like saturdays might be right for a young man trying to stay outta trouble
Tahir, I forgot what a wise polar bear you are, thank you, I've been too blinded by my anger recently to even consider that my perspective is off. I had been very task oriented, and trying to jump all the hurdles as fast as possible. I need to let time guide me more, and force things less.
MIKEF, I'm glad you liked the picture, they are called "de-motivational posters" because they are set in the same format as those motivational posters that people hang around office buildings. It's nice to know that new people are continuing to stumble across this forum. More voices, more inspiration!
Manon, humor is a necessity for me, I know that recovery is a serious process and can be very painful, but it's also a joy-filled thing too, occasionally I rub people the wrong way at meetings because they may interpret my humor as not taking it seriously enough, but hey it's not exactly a funeral service is it? It's the opposite, we are saving ourselves from an early death, It's something to celebrate about.
LizC, thanks, sometimes I forget that as humans we are flawed, and trust can be misplaced or given too readily, and people can manipulate and take advantage of you. I'm trying however to not let that thought dominate my interactions with others in recovery because I've been told often that working on healthy trust is important in recovery.
AnthonyG, hahah, yes! I can definitely see it now!
Vini, There is the verbal abuse I've missed, how have I managed these last several months without it!? hahah. I think it would actually be pretty cool to do some online service, and Saturdays sound pretty good to me. I have no idea how to operate the online meeting though, so hopefully someone can teach me, or more importantly hopefully I can learn, my mind is pretty slow these days.. it's been a lazy summer ya know. hah.
Learning not to trust our feelings and thought/perceptions in early recovery is important. We tend to victimize ourselves through our missed perceptions. Sometimes we do get slighted but it's what we do with it, and how we react that determines whether we are a victim of it, not the action itself.
If I catch a curable disease, and I don't go and get help for it, and later succumb to it, am I a victim of the disease? Or did I victimize myself? It's not what happens (notice how I left out "to us") it's how I react to it. My reactions can always make the situation worse and hurt me more. If I get angry, it hurts me. If I issolate it hurts me. And if I walk away from treating my disease, guess what? That's right, I'm victimizing myself. It sucks to own that at first (just like admitting that we are an addict), but it's the only way that we can get better. Don't let yourself run you out of your meetings.
Dean
-- Edited by DeanC on Sunday 2nd of August 2009 06:06:04 PM
The rooms are made up of people trying to do something deferent with there lives Scott, the fact that we say hi my name is ??????? and im an addict is saying hi I need help im sick!. Even the ones that burned you as well as your self.
What happened Scott? A lot of times we do not tell the full accurate story and we receive no help, to come and say that youve been burned and you will not go to anymore real meetings is confusing and not in tune with recovery, dont hide in this virtual box, its good for extra recovery but we recover in part to rejoin society not hid from it. this is a learning process,.dont let a few people that are clearly not working a program run you out of the rooms, all of us in NA are not all hear for the same reason.
your sponsor may just be a peace of crap! But if you dont share what happened none of us can really give any experience, strength or hope to you on that now can we?
think of me as your higher power jus for a minute
better put that cynical smurk away too boy put a size 12 upside yuh head LOLOLOL
