Hey BigV,,mikef here
sorry to here bout your brother in law..i wish you peace with that..things okay here.just getting over a pulled muscle in my lower back for a week that was a real pain!!!I think i mentioned i like to long distance run ,helps me think ,clean out ,pray etc,,cant run get cranky ,hopefully back on roads end of this week . going to have to strengthen those muscles a little better this round..tendency to lock up(running not greatest thing for ya!!)anyway my son comin home from katy texas,at this moment been with my eldest son(43) whom i just reestablished contact with after 31 years(talk about a blessing) anyway was a nice break for us(wife and I ) we had a setback before he split(he wrote a check out of our account for $70.00 bucks)said was going to pay back etc.been back with us for last 7 months from jail things been going okay until that(been clean of shooting heroin for close to 2 years but still thinks okay to smoke herb and drink)not quite the idea of recovery.anyway.we are still looking at what we'll be doing with that deal,(supposed to get an interview with a show called orange county choppers)they were looking for an apprentice to learn trade that is a "recovering" addict.part of the deal is 90 and 90 in the process....that could be a blessing ,says he is willing to do it ,though dont believe in program.time for "real recovery..we'll see out of our hands...hope the house thing works out that got to be a trip..patience doesnt seem to be the virtue of many addicts i know!!yep "life on lifes terms is the joint..we also try and focus on our blessings and grateful for where we are(miracle to be here at all,hear that!!)good talking to you peace mikef(good luck with your gold deal!)talk to you on the rebound!! 

Cute idea that Rumble,,heh heh.. 

How about the story of Mortimer ?
 
Walt Disney was a small time film producer then. Many times when he sat pondering in his office, he noticed a small little mouse run the breath of the room and then later go back. Though his seceretary was heard to shriek the eeks many times, Walt did nothing to that little mouse.  He was fascinated by it's seeming cheerfulness. 

Then one morning a lite bolt hits him and he thinks
" Im goin to make a cartoon of this mouse; Ill call the character Mortimer".
 
He exitedly calls his wife and when she comes down to the office says to him 
"That's a brilliant idea love, but why would the cinema going public be taken in with the name Mortimer ?". 
Then she closes her eyes as if deep in thought and blurts out 
"Why dont we call him, say, Mickey ?" 

Thus was born the legend of Mickey Mouse, the legend of Walt Disney and then all his later characters and finally the Disneyland legend !
 
Most great ideas they say are simple,,,hmmmm, sigh !!

-- Edited by Raman on Tuesday 14th of July 2009 06:49:52 PM

Raman I missed your post on the Hep C treatment my brother in law had it about 2 years ago and it was hell on this earth but once he got done said he never in so many years felt better, then the BIG C hit him and there was nothing left for him but pass. SO I HOPE AND PRAY for your treatment to go well my brother.

That was such a good story raman thanks .


Mike thanks for sharing and you too Sally, it's all good whatever it is theres something good to be found. Keep that back well mike i go through many bouts with my back must the arthritis I have naggs at me when I do too much, I use ice packs then hot shower and heating pad after seems to keep it from getting the spasms which can be very painful and hard to get rid of sounds like you may be there so keep the ice on it and the swelling down the swelling pinchs nerves hence spasms, the muscles turn into a cast around the nerve so the nerve doesn't get damaged further is how it was told to me.

I have come up with a gimick Sally its 5 days training and $870 for the course, get ertified to do lead base paint removal BIG $$$$ now i just have to find a money tree and take a week off and do it


Like to hear from Tahir if your around not seen much of him as late.

WOW in 2 days I'll have been a member here 3 years YEP shortly after relapsing the last time I found this board and stayed.

-- Edited by BigV on Tuesday 14th of July 2009 09:28:33 PM

My prayers are with you in your hour of need Vin.
Im also very greatful for your prescence here for 3 years, I have been previleged to see you deal with many things in your life and come out on top !
Keep it up bro,,,

well i made it a month and more than 5 days. i found out my best friend got in a car crash the other day. she was hit by a drunk. and now she's dead. so i haven't really been doing anything except crying and sleeping for the past few days. but see she was not only my best friend she was the one person who always yelled at me for doing drugs, she told me i had a problem, she convinced me to do something about my drug problem, and she helped pay for my first trip to treatment. f*cking A. she was only 18. god damn. im stuck in florida and i can't even go to her funeral.

Hi LizC,
I'm sorry to hear about your friend, Keep strong , from what you told us , that is what she wants you to do. she's the one who first helped you to recovery, the last thing she'll want is for you to relapse over her.

I know how hard it is to keep clean when life turns upside down. i was always using to numb the pain, which always made things even worse in the long run.

it's hard but it's worth it. go through the grieving , anger , and other emotions, they won;t kill you , they are part of the natural healing process.

she cared about you , and we care about you.

peggy

The only friends I have are recovering ones, including some I used with .
I thank God and NA that they and I are in recovery !

Most of my mates in using are all gone, hopefuly happy in kingdom come. 
It is very vivid how in the first few years of my recovery I regularly heard that so and so or someone else had died. I also saw that to many that came to NA an thought they were different and could go on suing socially. 
By Gods Grace all those deaths have not been in vain, if only to serve to as a reminder that things dont change out there. 

Lost two uncles, many friends, few relatives, many that I met in NA over the years to the disease of addiction.
. 
Im greatful Pa had stayed clean the last three months of his life after the heart bypass, till a kidney problem cut him down. 
That morning I rush to the hospital and they say
"He's been gone 10 minutes".  It felt like hell and I an addict did all I could to supress the intense frustration on not having been there in the last moment. 

About 10 years later and 12000 miles away from there, Ive just had a bath and suddenly realize "Il never see Pa again". 
It's taken me about 10 years to accept that the dead dont come back, no matter how hard I try ! 
I accept, though with a heavy heart !!

-- Edited by Raman on Sunday 19th of July 2009 08:30:41 AM

Right on Dean,
I believe it is only because of self-interest I now have something to live for, share with the newcomer and give to my family and friends.
I remember that night when I was driving my sponsor of that time back home , he wasnt well, so I took him home after the meeting.
At a signal light, we waited for green and i chanced to look to the left . I see this guy who Id used and played music with and pointed him ou t my sponsor.
The first thing my sponsor said was
" Youll have to completely let go these guys if you want to stay in recovery".
That nitght I read literature that said to stay away from old playgrounds, playmates and playthings.
That was one of the first "ground lessons" I learnt in recovery.

This old mate was gone in three years.
Eacbh year it happens.
Last year it was a guy that wed tried very hard to see clean, he died a raving lunatic who thought he was Christ in thye coming. I played my sax for his funeral mass !
Amazing Grace seemed emotion filled, God rest his soul.
And just last week we hear of a pla that was a user who had diabetes and a bit of dementia and was not ever supposed to use or drink but did anyways. He was a fab keyboardist too,
his using aggrevated the diabetes which in turn hurt hois kidneys and then he was gone, all of 49 years, just 1 year older than me.

And yes Dean,I have no doubt whatsoever that this is a selfish Program, one of self interest !

Though it feels bad when they go, we need to Step over their dead bodies and pray to God to rest them in Soulful Eternal Slumber.
Words from an old hymn have always given me courage

O God, our help in ages past,
Our hope for years to come,
Our shelter from the stormy blast,
And our eternal home.

Under the shadow of Thy throne
Thy saints have dwelt secure;
Sufficient is Thine arm alone,
And our defence is sure.

Before the hills in order stood,
Or earth received her frame,
From everlasting Thou art God,
To endless years the same.

Thy Word commands our flesh to dust,
Return, ye sons of men:
All nations rose from earth at first,
And turn to earth again.
A thousand ages in Thy sight
Are like an evening gone;
Short as the watch that ends the night
Before the rising sun.

The busy tribes of flesh and blood,
With all their lives and cares,
Are carried downwards by the flood,
And lost in following years.
Time, like an ever rolling stream,
Bears all its sons away;
They fly, forgotten, as a dream
Dies at the opening day.

Like flowery fields the nations stand
Pleased with the morning light;
The flowers beneath the mowers hand
Lie withering ere tis night.
Our God, our help in ages past,
Our hope for years to come,
Be Thou our guard while troubles last,
And our eternal home.


That said, NA is a spiritual and not religious Program and I quote this lovely hymn not as a religious symbol but as one of very soothing words !

E

D

I

Easy Does It.


K

I

S

Keep It Simple


J

F

T

Just for Today




H

O

W

Honesty, Openminded, Willing.


Live in the solution, NOT the problem.


Your not alone.


We all have scars, look at those scars as why your here.

I know this is wistful stuff, but someday we may see many of these great guys in NA,,
Jackson just missed the bus, vant say who else may hop on and stay on !