so the struggles kinda continues but at least i'm seeing the cause and the direction of it all.  I realized that I had become comfortable in my recovery and I didn't want anything to change..... the problem is that everything always change, relationships grow and change and I was not willing to go along.... I kinda see my recovery and this tall pillars.... and i'm jumping from one to another... right now i'm in the middle of my jump and this being in the air floating is not a comfortable feeling.... but this too shall pass.... i also was able to book an emergency appointment with my psychiatrist this week to talk about the mental health issues i've been feeling, and i'm open to talking about medications again.... i don't really want too, but I have to accept that I have more than one uncurable condition... addiction and my other diagnosis.... so yea but at least I can see the light.......

andrea