Hey, I got your message on my 2 week post. Believe me I can sympathize with the difficulty, but now on my third week I find there are more good days than bad, and sleep is getting much better. Even though I am irritable sometimes I don't think going backwards would help. Not sure what would but know I don't want to go back.
I am very happy to hear you did not shake your baby. Frustration with an infant is very common, on or off drugs. You have to know everything is better for the baby if you are off drugs. I think my son is the #1 reason i quit and I continue to focus on him. I think to myself I have to put my own misery aside and raise him. he did not ask to be born, I wanted to have a baby, now I am going to be the best mom I can. I owe it to him.
I don't forget I owe it to myself, I quit knowing better things are on the horizon and everyone here confirms that. Believe that it DOES get easier, week by week, there are downs but there are more and more ups.
I have also finally had a few peaceful nights, finally without nightmares or insmonia. All the little things make me believe there are more and more little things out there every day that are good.
Do not give up, you are on the right path, right by HP- right by your kids- right by you.
I'm really proud of you, two weeks can be an eternity, and now two weeks is behind you. 2-3 went by much faster and easier than 1-2!!
