I know nightmares after quitting is normal but it seems like every single night for 16 nights I have had the most vivid and weird dreams, sometimes nightmares, and user dreams. Last night all night was a nightmare of using and users and paying money and not really wanting to but being in the middle of it all and not being able to get out. I feel like a night-time psycho. Funny how I feel more psycho after quitting than when I was using, I guess because I was just numb all the time. The blessing is it scares me so much I don't want to go backwards at all because I just want this to be over. I know recovery is life long but can anyone tell me how much longer I can expect this night time h*ll to go away?!!
I have no idea but I know they will. I think nightmares reflect our fears and having a fear of using is a healthy fear. Enjoy your clean, for real, days!
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The truth does not change based on my inability to stomach it - Flannery O'Connor
My happiness grows in direct proportion to my acceptance and in inverse proportion to my expectations - Michael J. Fox
Eventually they let up. At 21 years and change clean,I still have using dreams from time to time. I can smell it and taste it in the dreams too,but they're just dreams. Our brains remember everything.
As bd87na said, the brain remembers, plus our electro-chemical soup up there is pretty much scrambled...the entire withdrawal process (according to the science of addiction) goes on way, way longer than the acute withdrawal that we all recognize.
Regarding the long term physiological (not psychological) damage, I'm 24 years + clean and still (rarely, but still) have using dreams and related nightmares. They are rare, but so real it's still scary, even tho I know it's "just" my screwed up neurons kicking up for some reason..usually for no reason that I can discern. For me, generally, the more balanced my daily routine, daily nutrition, sleep, relaxation, and stress management are, the less this bizarre stuff emerges during the night. My opinion, my experience, only.
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From dying and surviving to living and thriving. LeeU
what you're thinking about later in the evening, watching on tv, or heard in the night meeting, can influence your dreams. The first 2 years of recovery, I turned the tv off mostly, and for sure didn't watch the news or read about it. Stayed away from drama, bad news, people trying to dump their problems on me. And tried not to solve my problems in my head after 6pm. Just tried to keep it positive and think about pleasent things and experiences, listen to positive music. I really controlled my media. Give it a shot. Going to morning, noon, or 5:00pm meetings will help.
I wish I knew but I don't. What I do know is that I am 7 months clean and I still have those crazy dreams. Not everynight but they are just as crazy. They do not bother me as bad as they use to. When I first got sober the dreams would haunt me all day and or for days but the farther away from the drugs I have gotten the less the dreams bother me. I wish you the best of luck getting through the bad dreams. Let me know if there is any thing I can do to help.
One of the first instances in my life when I began to feel ashamed of myself was when I was about 12. I began having violent dreams and shoted and screamed in my sleep. I also did sleepwalking and kicking in my sleep.
I was very embarassed,,especially after my parents began to aks me to control myself. My Grandma gave me prayers to recite . None of us knoew exactly what I had to do in order to stop being disturbed in my sleep.
Then came the first consultations with the psycholigist and then the medication,,first instances of feeling numb. Being an addictive personality that began to have effect. I believe that this is when the physical allergy was activated. Then came the ganja,booze,tabs,opiates,smack and morphine,LSD and finally I was at the edge of Kingdom Come !!!
Divine intervention did its job and after 2 hospitalizations,ashrams, 1 treatment centre I came into NA I saw what was happening with other addicts and I decided to stay. I came,I saw,I was conquered !!!
Using dreams have been rampant ion the early days of recovery. Then came a time of peaceful sleep. Later that went and I was left with some snoring which over the years has grown.
But let me share that theres a solution= the days I am centred around the spirituality of this Program is when I have a blissful,restful sleep. Those are the days I have when I have done the right thing for the right reason. I hope that grows.
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
The insight I have gained is that disturbed sleep was because of a disturbed day and the day was disturbed when my desires were blocked. The thing is no one educated me on this. But,,like the Basic Text says MORE WILL BE REVEALED !
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Thanks Raman, very interesting, I also had very disturbed sleep as a child and got into drugs because they helped me sleep, now that I'm off I have to finally learn to control myself.
